Like a Bird on a Telephone Wire
by kingfisherwings
Summary: When Dean gets lost in BFE Texas, he finds someone else who's lost in ways that have nothing to do with maps. Warning: Non-con roleplay.
1. Chapter 1

Fine, he was willing to admit it, to himself at least. He was beyond fucking lost.

Dean pulled over on the side of a road that looked like every other road he'd been looking at for the past couple of hours. There were a lot of them since his GPS crapped out. Or maybe it was the same two over and over again. And he had to face up to the harsh reality: Hot Global Babe had dumped him in the middle of a motherfucking desert. And he had half of a liter bottle of water. And about a quarter tank of gas. And no idea where in fuck he was, except in Texas. Maybe.

He pulled out his phone. _Little break for the kid? Yeah?_

No. It had actually shut itself off to avoid wasting battery on futility.

_I think maybe I have a problem._ Getting lost was probably what he deserved for insisting it was cool, he could make the drive alone, no big deal, just follow the GPS. Sure, yeah, he deserved getting lost. But it was starting to sink in that he could actually die out here. That seemed a little harsh just for depending on technology a little too much.

Low-tech was a huge failure, too; there was no map in the glove compartment. Not that it would have helped all that much, a map ironically being useless for getting to point B if you don't know where point A is.

He was looking in the trunk for one anyway when an antique of a pickup crunched in the gravel behind him. _Great. Here lies Dean Ambrose, shot by a redneck._ He turned to see the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen in his life - and that was saying something, given his job - leaning out the driver's side window.

"Need some help?"

"No. I need a _lot_ of help."

She jumped out. The body matched the face, definitely. "Did you break down?"

"No, I'm lost. And low on gas. And lower on water. The sad old tourist story, right?"

"It would be, if there were tourists around here. They're mostly around the park. Where are you going?"

"San Antonio."

"Damn. Where from?"

"Austin."

She stared at him for a good 10 or 15 seconds, then dissolved into laughter. "Texas Geography 101 is now in session. San Antonio and San Angelo are two different places."

He thought back to the last road sign he'd seen, about a hundred years ago. "Aw, fuck me. How far off am I?"

"A lot. It's not hard to get back once you get on the right road. But if there's something for you to be late for, you're probably going to be." She went back to her truck and started rooting around in the tiny back seat of the cab. He watched, enjoying a few moments of a crystal clear vision of her bent like that over the hood of his car, long legs spread wide, dress crumpled around her waist, begging for his cock while he gave it to her good and deep. He shook his head hard to clear it. That was not the way to get rescued.

She came back lugging a huge gas can. "This will get you to where you can fill up."

It might have. If the nozzle on the can had fit into his car's gas tank.

"Damn it. It fits mine. I never thought about it not fitting something newer." She chewed her lip in a way he would have liked to have been doing. "The closest thing to civilization from here is my place. But you'd be stuck for the night. The gas station is closed."

He looked at his watch. Wonder of wonders, that still worked. "At 6:30?"

"The guy who owns it has to eat supper, too. He'll have a gas can he can sell you that'll work, though. In the morning."

"I don't suppose you have a phone that works? I'm going to get canned if I miss work with no excuse."

"They don't work out here. I've got a computer hooked up for satellite, if you've got someone you can email."

"Which also means following you home."

She nodded. "I can offer you some supper, too, not that it's going to be anything fancy."

"I'm too hungry to be picky." He was, too. He'd been too preoccupied with being thirsty to notice until she said something. "Listen, I'll pay you for all this. The gas, the food, the pain in the ass I'm being."

She took three steps closer, until she was right up against him. He willed himself to do two things: Not have a huge coughing fit right in her face, and not have a hard-on.

He didn't cough.

"You're a lot bigger than me. Stronger. You could rape me right here on the side of the road and I couldn't do a thing about it. No matter how much I fought, you could still make me take this." She slid her hand over his thigh and stroked what his willpower hadn't been enough to prevent. "Ooh, it's too big. You'd really have to force that in me. It would hurt. But you still could, couldn't you?"

_God damn, I'm going to wake up any minute now. And I'm going to be so pissed when I do._ "Yeah, I could. No matter how much you kicked and screamed. You could try running away, I suppose. But I'd catch you. And it would only make me angry."

She stared into his eyes for a few seconds, then straight-armed him as hard as she could. It staggered him back against the car, more because he wasn't expecting it than because she was especially strong. She took off toward the front of the car.

She was quick, but not quick enough. He caught her before she reached the fender and pulled her back against him, one hand pulling the elastic front of her dress down, the other pinning her hips against him. "I'm going to fuck you. And you're going to shut up and take it."

She fought like a wildcat; he went from play-restraining her to forcing her down on the hood of the car in a hurry. It was almost his brief fantasy; she was screaming and begging him _not_ to, but that was better. Much better. If someone drove by right now, they were going to put him _under_ the jail, but that made it even better. "Shut up. You know you want it. That's what that sweet little cunt is for. I'll bet you were already wet for some hard cock when you pulled over, weren't you?" He grabbed a handful of her hair and yanked her head back. "_Weren't_ you?"

"No!" She twisted and almost slipped out from under him. He dropped his full weight on her, flattening her against the hood again, driving the breath out of her in a choked gasp.

He took the opportunity to pull her dress up around her waist and push his hands under her, kneading and squeezing her breasts. "Nice of you not to wear a bra. Maybe I'll give you a load on these sweet tits later just to thank you right."

"No! Bastard!" It wasn't much more than a choked whisper. He liked how it sounded.

He clenched his hands down hard on her breasts, his cock pulsing hard enough to hurt when she shrieked.

"Had enough foreplay? All right." Still pinning her with his body, he reached down and tore her panties off. "Spread. Show me that hot little cunt."

"No, please! Don't rape me with that big cock, please...it's too much, too much!"

He moved to the side a little, enough to jam his knee between her legs. He forced it up, opening her legs. "What the hell are you bitching about, anyway? It's what you're for: Service some hard cock, get shot full of cum."

"NO! Oh God, please, no!" She started struggling again, but there wasn't anywhere for her to go. She reached back to claw at his legs, but all she found was thick denim under her fingers. "Please don't, not your naked cock, please don't make me take your cum."

He laughed and lifted her head back up. "You'll take it and love it. Or do you want me to smack your head against the car until you're out? I'll rape you anyway, I don't care if you're awake for it. But it'll mess up that pretty face."

"No, please don't. I'll...I'll get you off. Don't hurt me."

"But hurting you is how I'm gonna get off, baby." He took a step back, still holding her hair. "God damn, you look like a little slut, just waiting for it. Don't move, slut. Keep waiting."

He let go of her hair, waiting for her to bolt. She stayed there, trembling, exposed. He opened his pants and just let them fall. It looked like chasing was over. He didn't think he could any more, not as hard as he was.

"Let's see what you've got for me before you find out what I've got for you." He crossed his first two fingers and shoved them up into her. She screamed. He thought it wasn't completely put on; she was tight as hell. Soaking wet, too. He worked her a little anyway, enjoying how she bucked and twisted and begged.

"Please, it's too big. Please stop, please."

He laughed. "That's not my cock, slut. You've still got your fuck coming."

She screamed and started pleading, promising him all kinds of interesting things if he'd only stop.

"Keep talking. You'll be doing all of it later. After you get fucked."

He pulled his fingers out of her, smiling at the moan she tried to stifle. He grabbed her hips and pushed her up further on the hood so her feet were off the ground, lined up, and slammed into her. She shrieked. He could only get half in on the first thrust, even though he'd gone in hard; he buried himself to the hilt with the second one. She came as he was pulling out to slam it home again.

The sound of his hips slapping against her ass tangled with her moans. "Done playing poor little raped girl, darlin'? You want my cock?"

"Yes, yes...oh fuck, yes."

"Tell me _all_ about it."

She did, through two more orgasms. That was enough; it would be a shame to spoil her.

She knew what was coming when he started fucking her faster, his thrusts getting shorter and sharper. "Not in me, please, please. I was good, I _was_. I took your cock just like you said to. Please don't make me take your cum, please." And all the while, she was wiggling against every thrust.

He slammed up into her as hard as he could; she shrieked and bucked against him as he jerked her hips back and ground into her as far as he could. "Take it deep, slut. Ahh, take it _all_."

He pulled out as soon as he was done. Grinning, he gave her a good smack on the ass. He would have sworn she came again. "Let's go. You're a good little fuck, you know that? Gave me an appetite."


	2. Chapter 2

He thought she might try to ditch him while he was following her home. It wouldn't be hard; pavement gave way to gravel, and then to packed dirt as they went further into the desert. But she drove carefully, used her signals, and gave every impression of wanting him to arrive in one piece. She even tapped her horn before she swerved wide around a pothole that would have swallowed the car. It coasted into her yard sucking fumes.

The house was tiny, adobe, with a couple of outbuildings - a wooden one that looked like it was waiting until no one was looking to fall over, and an adobe one in much better shape. As far as he could see, that was it.

The house was nicer inside than he was expecting. It didn't look like much more than living room, bedroom, kitchen, and bathroom, but the furniture looked way beyond comfortable, and there were rugs that looked handmade all over the place, and a lot of pottery stuff. She walked around turning on lights, then pulled up an email program on the computer. "Whoever you need to let know, here you go." She wandered off to let him have what privacy was possible in such a small place.

He decided to plug his own email into the program so Seth would recognize it; the whole thing was pretty self-explanatory. _I'm stranded in the middle of Buttfuck Egypt. And yeah, before you ask, I got fucking lost, okay?_

It took a few minutes. _We were starting to wonder, man. You all right?_

It gave him an idea. "Do you have a camera? Digital?"

"Yes."

"Bring it here."

She did. She looked more curious than worried about why. A quick glance gave him some good news. It took video. "I want to show my friends what I found. On your knees."

She didn't hesitate at all.

"Suck me off."

She unzipped him, took his cock out, and went to work like she'd been waiting for permission. Probably she had. She was fucking amazing at it, too. He waited until it was going just how he liked it, then pushed the record button. "Louder. Say hello to Seth and Roman. Show them how much you love to suck cock."

He really hoped the camera had sound. It would be a sad thing for them to miss the slurping. And the moaning.

"Look at the camera. Let them see those pretty eyes."

The look she turned up to the camera was enough to finish him off.

"Here it comes, darlin'. Swallow it all like a good little slut."

She did, then licked what she'd missed off his cock. She never took her eyes off the camera. When she'd tucked his cock away again, he turned off the camera. "Good girl. Go make us something to eat."

She got up and went into the kitchen without a word. He almost had to call her back to find the camera cable, but he finally turned it up in one of the desk drawers. He sent an email that just said _Yeah, I'm all right_, with the video attached.

It took a while. The food was starting to smell seriously good when the answer came back. _Stranded, my ass. Who's the smoking chick with a mouthful of you?_

Good question. "What's your name?"

"Citialli."

"Uh, try again?"

She did, more slowly this time, and spelled it. It sounded like something she'd done a few times. He smiled when she didn't ask his. Since she hadn't, he told her.

_Her name's Citialli. And I really am stranded. I'm sitting in her living room in the middle of the fucking desert. Do I still have a job?_

_Yeah, you're cool. Two other people got lost, too. Not as good as you did, probably. I bet they put us all on a bus next time. You staying?_

_Hell, yeah. We haven't even gotten started on what she's gonna do for me._

_What's she doing now?_

_Making dinner. I think I'll be staying over my off days._

_Any more video you want to pass on, I'm around._

He was really tempted to take some of her cooking, just to drive Seth nuts.

The food was simple, as she'd said it would be, but good. She made a lot of it, but they still finished all of it between them. It looked like her little workout had built up an appetite for her, too.

"What the hell do you do out here, anyway?"

"I'm a potter."

"Yeah, but what do you do for a _living_?"

"That."

"Really? I never met anyone who did that and, you know, wasn't a waiter, too." Not that he'd met a hundred thousand potters or anything, but he figured she'd get the idea.

"That's why I live out here. Well, one reason, anyway."

"So you don't meet anyone?"

She laughed. "No, so I don't have to work a McJob. Cost of living isn't exactly high out here."

He watched her do the dishes; why that got him hard, he had no idea, but it did. "Come here."

She did, eyes blazing and hungry. Well, all she got last time _was_ a drink.

"Take the dress off."

She did, simply and quickly, not making a show of it. Dean reached out and grabbed her arm, yanking her onto the couch. He pushed her roughly until he had her where he wanted her, on her knees, leaning over the back. "Spread."

He wasn't holding on to her hard, so she was able to yank her arm free. She tried to climb over the arm of the couch. He grabbed her again, using her arm and a handful of her hair to put her back where he'd had her to start with. "I said _spread_."

She tried to get away again, but he had a much better grip on her this time. "This can go two ways. You spread and take it in that hot little cunt again, or I spread you and it goes up your ass. I'll like that fine, but I don't think you will."

He was genuinely curious what she'd do. She didn't move.

"You earned it. You remember that." He yanked her off the couch by the hair and dragged her, snarling and struggling, to the kitchen. He pulled her to her knees as he started opening cabinets. She started unzipping his pants.

He gave her hair a good pull. "You suck cock when I tell you to. Sit there."

He found what he wanted in the third cabinet - a nice, big bottle of cooking oil.

"Get up." As soon as she was on her feet, he dragged her over to the counter and forced her down over it. Perfect height. He spun the cap off the bottle of oil and poured it on his cock, slicking it up good with one hand.

She waited until he was busy with that before she tried to bolt again. He tackled her in the living room; they hit one of the rugs, but they both still let out pained sounds. He pinned her face-down and forced her legs apart. His cock was aching a little from the jolt he'd taken, but he knew just how to make it feel better. She was twisting under him, and clenched down tight, but he got his cock up her ass on the second try; he'd used a _lot_ of oil. It wasn't great lube, but it would do.

She fought every second of it, screaming and sobbing, but a couple of minutes in, she lifted her hips to give him better access. He took it. "You're a bad little slut, aren't you?"

"Yes...yes, please, no more. I'll be good, so good."

"Yes, you will. But first you have to take your punishment fuck."

"No! I'll be good, I promise, oh fuck, it _hurts_."

"Don't ever tell me no." He pulled back until only the head was in her, then slammed in until his hips smacked against her ass. "You deserve to be punished, don't you?"

"YES! Oh God, please..."

"Liar." He took her hard. It felt so damn good. She started pushing back to meet his thrusts. "Such a little slut for my cock. You like it up your ass, don't you?"

"Nooo...please, no."

"You're going to come. Don't lie to me." He twisted a fistful of her hair around his hand and found her clit with the other one. "You _must_ be a slut if getting raped up the ass gets you off."

She shuddered under him; it just about drove him over the edge. "Say it and I'll let you come."

"Please...don't make me, _please_."

"Don't make you say it, or don't make you come?"

"I...I don't know."

He laughed. "Do both. _Now_." He ground his thumb against her clit, and she went off like she was wired to explode.

"YES! Oh please, yes, fuck my ass, I love it, oh God, I love it so much, make me your slut, Dean, please make me."

It was the first time she'd addressed him by name. He liked how it sounded when she moaned it that way. "Do it. Come with my cock in your hot little ass."

She did - hard and loudly. He went right after her; it felt like she was wringing the cum out of him. She slumped down onto the rug when he let go of her. He left her there.

She was still there when he got back. "Get up. In bed, where you're handy if I want to fuck again later."

She led him into the bedroom. Unlike the rest of the house, it was a bit of a wreck. There were paperbacks scattered and stacked all over the place, a couple of open packs of smokes on the floor, a little pile of money on the bedside table, and a handgun on the floor next to the bed. Somehow the funniest thing to him was the half a bag of Oreos next to it. Or maybe the bottle of bourbon next to _that_.

He gestured her into the bed, then snagged one of the packs of cigarettes and got in with her. She reached up on a little shelf above the bed and fished down a lighter and a small cracked plate doing duty as an ashtray. She also knocked down a pack of rolling papers.

"What goes in those is the only thing you bother hiding, I guess." He lit a cigarette, took a drag, and passed it to her. It was a habit he'd mostly put behind him, but at times like this...She took it, looking dreamy-eyed and thoroughly at peace with the universe.

"Asshole over there thinks it's catnip."

He turned to inspect the cat she nodded toward. He couldn't imagine how he'd missed the damn thing to this point. It had to be 15 pounds. "What's its name?"

"His. And I already told you."

He did a quick mental rewind. "You named your cat Asshole?"

"Go over there and pet him and you'll find out why. You want some?"

It took him a second to retrack. "Better not. Work's real fond of 'Surprise! Here's a cup!'."

"Do you have to leave in the morning?"

It was the first thing she'd asked him about, well..._anything_. "I have a couple days off." He leaned down and picked up the gun. It would be about his luck to step on it when he got up to go take a leak. "You have trouble with burglars or something?"

"Out here? No, rattlesnakes."

He yanked his arm back into bed as she giggled.


	3. Chapter 3

He had no idea what time it was when he woke up. It was still dark. Citialli wasn't in bed with him. He thought lazily about punishing her for it, but he was feeling too mellow. He got up to go find her, though.

She was sitting on the porch in his shirt and an impossibly tiny pair of panties, a joint in one hand, the bottle of bourbon next to her. The smile she turned up to him said she was already most of the way into orbit. "Couldn't sleep. Sure you don't want some?"

_Screw it, if they tag me, I'll pay the fine._ He was already wondering what kind of fuck she'd be like this. He sat by her and took the joint, hit it, then pulled her toward him and shotgunned her. She took the smoke, then his tongue behind it, moaning softly against his lips. She tasted like good bourbon and better weed, and his cock started twitching Morse code at him: _She'll spread for it if you tell her to. Tell her to, moron._

She gave him back the shotgun, fingers tangled in his hair, tongue working urgently, swaying in his hands. "Fuck me some more, Dean. Please."

_Hell, yeah._ They finished the joint, passed the bottle a couple of times, and she looked ready for anything he wanted to do to her.

He pushed her down onto her back, pinned her wrists above her head, and kissed her some more. _We taste the same._ The thought made his cock pulse.

When he broke the kiss, she was shaking her head. "Not like this. _Fuck_ me."

He smiled. "You'll fuck how I tell you. Lay still." He peeled her panties off, slowly and carefully, doing the exact opposite of tearing them. "You should just go without. Easier for me." He stripped his shirt off her just as carefully, raising it to his face and breathing in deep: Hotel soap, his own smell, pot smoke, and her.

"Do you have a regular fuck? A nice, mama's boy artist type you can tell how to do you, right? Polite skinny cock, polite skinny fuck, always makes sure you get off 2.5 times before he does? Calls himself your _lover_?"

"No," she whispered. "No one. Not for five years."

"But you've fucked in that time."

She nodded.

"How many men have you picked up on the road like this?"

"Three."

"Including me?"

She nodded again.

"You've been fucked three times in five _years_? Did the other two get you right, at least?"

"No. One of them chickened out, just banged me kind of hard once and took off. The other one..."

"He hurt you." He knew she understood what he meant; there were a lot of different kinds of hurt, weren't there?

She nodded. "I had to drive myself to the hospital after he left."

"But I'm getting you right."

"Yes, Dean. God, yes. But not like this, please."

"However I want."

She whimpered when his tongue slid into her, caressing and rasping where she had to be feeling tender by now. But she was wet, and getting more with every lick. "Feeling a little sore, darlin'?"

"Please don't. Please, please..." The protests were getting weaker with each one.

"You want it." He moved up her body again, parting her legs, pressing his cock against the hot wetness it was craving.

"I _don't_ want it, Dean, _please_."

"I do. So you'll take it." He tensed like he was going to ram it through her, then went as slowly and gently as he could. She made tiny, whimpering sounds he realized were cries of _ow, ow, ow_, up until he was in her all the way and stopped moving. She really _was_ sore, then. "Goddamn. I can feel your pussy squeezing me, baby. Like it wants to suck my cock. You feel so fucking good." She moaned in pain again as he started thrusting, taking her as slow and easy as a scared virgin. Her pleas had faded to tiny moans. He worked her slow and deep for a while longer, enjoying her cries, pain and pleasure all rolled together. She cursed at him furiously as she came.

It was enough. The idea was to train her, not to shatter her. He pulled out and moved up her body, straddling her just below her breasts. "You still owe me something."

He put his hands down to either side of her head, catching some hair with each, keeping her still. He slid his cock between her breasts, groaning roughly at the sensations - hot and silky skin, delicate pressure, the exquisite sensations of her chest rising and falling with her quickening breath, of her heart pounding against the pulse throbbing in him. "Tighter. Use your hands."

She raised them, wincing at the pulling it gave her hair to move even that much, and pressed her breasts tight around his cock as he started thrusting.

It didn't take long; it didn't have to. This was all his. When he was close, he pulled his cock out from between her breasts and started stroking himself roughly over them. She made a frustrated, hungry sound and slapped his hand away, replacing it with hers.

He came so hard he swore he could hear it hit her skin. He smiled down at the sight of her, moaning and bucking, his cum sliding over her breasts. He scooped up some with his fingertips and gave them to her to suck. She did, eyes closed, face ecstatic.

"Such a sweet girl. You like what I _tell_ you to like, and it's gonna be so good for you."

Dean was awake again early in the morning. At least the sun was up this time. He was hungry, but he thought Citialli could use more sleep after the day...and night...and start of the next day they'd put in. He went outside to have a better look around.

The wooden outbuilding was a storage shed. The other was her studio. He had a sudden inspiration. He went in, found a pencil and paper, and wrote detailed instructions. He left the paper on the wheel, weighted down with the pencil, and went back on the porch to get the longer view.

It was pretty impressive in the early morning sunlight. Scrub and sand extended all around for miles; he had no idea how far. On two sides, it ended at the foot of mountains that were a purple he thought only happened in paintings.

"That's another reason I live way the hell out here." She was standing behind him, in another of the thin cotton dresses she seemed to favor. She handed him a pair of binoculars. "See that big tree all alone out there?"

"Yeah?" It didn't look big from here; it was a long way off.

"Aim for it, look at the base."

When he had the binoculars focused right, he could see a wire fence.

"That's my property line - the last good reason to live out here. Land is dirt cheap. Pardon the pun."

He'd been thinking about asking her to leave with him. But there was no way she'd want to; he could see that. This was her home. And who'd feed that horse she claimed was a cat? Never mind that she didn't seem to have any idea at all who he was or what he did; she had no TV, and viewed the internet as a telephone as far as he could tell. He thought his life would be a shock to her, maybe too much of one; besides, he kind of liked it this way. Hell, he liked it a _lot_. She wanted him because she wanted him, that was all. It had been a few years since he'd been able to be sure of that with any woman.

But there was another way that wouldn't end in her fleeing from how he lived: His little fucktoy, out here waiting for him, getting hotter and hungrier for it by the day, no one seeing her, all alone waiting for him to take the ache away. _All_ his. Yeah, he could get behind that idea. And she _would_. He was going to make sure of it.

It didn't take much getting ready. His email went in the program he'd been using on her computer, Skype got installed and explained. She got it quickly in spite of apparently never having thought of using it herself. She shrugged when he asked why and said, "I don't have anyone to call." She did now. He was going to bring a better camera with him when he came back, too.

Now they were ready to get the rules in place. He'd been looking forward to it all day.

She took instruction so much better while he was fucking her in the ass. And it was so much more fun to give that way, too.

"No more getting fucked on the side of the road, first off. Unless it's me doing it."

When she didn't answer right away, he just pulled back and rammed into her as hard as he could. Her whole body spasmed; it felt amazing around him. "Oh, _fuck_! That hurts, you're hurting me!"

"Then don't play games. You understand your orders, you say so."

"Yes, I promise. No more, only you, just you."

"Good. Second, when I call, you answer naked. When I email and tell you to call me, you strip first. You're going to be performing for me, so you might as well not waste my time on buttons and shit."

"Yes, Dean."

"Damn, I like how that sounds coming out of your mouth. You can answer me that way from now on."

"Yes, Dean."

His thrusts were growing more urgent, and she was pushing back to meet them.

"You don't get yourself off while I'm gone, either. Not unless you're doing it on camera for me. I want your body fucking screaming for it when I get back."

"Ye-yes, Dean. Oh God, harder, harder, please..."

She was being so good. It didn't seem like so much to ask. He started putting it to her hard; she was really flying high on it. He pushed one hand under her. There wasn't much room to move it when he had her pinned the way he did, but he didn't feel like letting her up. He found her clit with two fingers and rubbed, laughing softly at her low, animal growl. "You're going to be a good little slut for me while I'm gone, aren't you?"

She moaned softly. "Yes, Dean. Please, oh please..."

He let her. He gave rewards, too, not just punishments, and she'd earned this one.

He thought hard about how they were going to say goodbye. He wanted to give her a long, brutal fuck she'd remember when he was gone, use every hole, but he wanted her frustrated and hungry even before his car was gone up the road. He wanted frenzy when he came back for her.

He waited until he was on the porch, Citialli standing silent and withdrawn beside him. "On your knees. If you can't tell me goodbye, you can suck me goodbye."

He knew it would be good; she'd see it as her last chance to show him how much he wanted to come back. He already wanted to. By the time she tilted her head back so he could watch her swallow his cum, he was seriously considering just not leaving. But real life waited out there, no matter how weird it was.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean waited two days; it was all he could stand. He wanted Citialli all aching and frustrated, yeah - but he didn't want himself that way. It took him a while to arrange some time alone in the hotel room, but he managed.

First, the email: _Call. Now._

It took her a couple of minutes, which wasn't bad for her first try. But she was dressed.

"You looking for fucking trouble? What did I tell you?"

"Hello, Dean. I thought you might forgive me just this once." She stood and kicked the chair so it rolled across the room, then reached out of the camera's range to do something.

He knew what was coming when the music started, delicate though the guitar was. She spent the first minute, before the song kicked in hard, slowly taking her dress off; she was naked under it. He wondered if she was aware these calls were recordable; he was damn glad he was aware of it.

When the music really hit, he realized what was going to be coming was him. Hard. He made it through about 20 seconds of her swaying and writhing and grinding for him before he just gave up on pretending he hadn't done this because he wanted to jack off. Even if it hadn't been why, it was now.

She saw him practically rip open his jeans, and smiled. "Let me see, Dean. I want to watch you doing it. Show me how hard I make you."

He pushed his chair back, wondering just how in hell this all got turned around on him. That was all right, for now. But he was going to fuck her until she couldn't move without bursting into tears. Soon.

He outlasted the song, which he personally considered an achievement. She pulled the chair back and sat close to the screen, watching him avidly.

"Do you know what a sexy man you are?" Her voice was a caressing almost-moan. "Your body makes me crazy. That's why I stopped on the road, you know. I wanted my legs wrapped around that ass while you fucked me. And those eyes, damn. And you have such a beautiful cock. I love being on my knees for it. Licking it. Worshipping it. God, I wish that was my hand."

"So do I."

The words were barely understandable. She smiled. "Close those gorgeous eyes, Dean. Just like that. Then it _will_ be my hand."

She knew he was far enough into it to almost believe as he moaned through clenched teeth. "Can you feel it, baby? My hand stroking your hard cock, making it even hotter with all that rubbing? I want your cum all over my fingers, baby. Do it for me."

His groan as he came sounded like something torn from him. She smiled.

"Open your eyes, baby."

There was nothing on the two fingers she slid between her lips, moaning as she lapped and sucked on them. But it wasn't so hard to imagine there was.

"Come back to me soon, Dean. I want to taste you for real." She reached out and cut off the call.

"Soon. Very soon." He thought it sounded almost like a prayer in the choked whisper that was the best he could manage. He sank back in his chair, smiling.

* * *

"Aw _fuck_, man, seriously? At least put it away."

Dean groaned. Somehow he'd fallen asleep. Without bothering to put his dick back in his pants, as Seth was pointing out.

He tucked it in, thinking he should probably wash his hands, too. It had been damn near real there for just a minute or two - but not enough so to keep him from being all sticky.

When he got back, Seth was watching the recording of the call. Dean thought about stopping him, but what the hell? _Let him see what's waiting for me, what she'll do for me._

"Fuck, man, she's beautiful. How the hell do you get so lucky?"

_My sexy ass, apparently._ He'd be hearing all about that if he stuck around to the end. Dean wanted something to eat. "Enjoy. I'll be back in an hour or so."

It didn't take Seth long to figure out why Dean had wanted time alone. He was starting to think he wanted some, too, but Roman was on his way back. He paused the video, reluctantly, then clicked back to the beginning. Some things were just too good not to share.

And Roman's reaction was too good to miss. "Holy _shit_. That's the chick he was shacked up with? What the hell's he doing _here_?"

"Wishing he was there, I'll bet. I would be."

And then she started dancing.

"Fuck, man...Imagine how it would feel, her doing that on your cock. No wonder Dean actually smiled like three whole times this week."

They stared, sure when the music ended and she sat down that the fun was over. Seth was reaching to start it over when they heard it: "Do you know what a sexy man you are?"

They watched in stunned silence until she reached up and switched off the call.

"Man," Seth said, aware his voice was too hoarse. "She's..."

"Yeah. And he's a lucky bastard, too. I hope he knows it."

* * *

He knew the door wouldn't be locked; she'd told him she never did. Only when she was gone, and she'd smiled a little sheepishly and said she sometimes forgot then, too.

She jumped up off the couch when he opened the door, starting to reach behind it. She stopped when she saw who it was.

"I came back for more, baby. Strip."

She waited until he was out of the doorway, then made a run for it. He let her. She was two steps out on the porch when Roman caught her. She looked up at him - way up - eyes enormous.

"I thought we could have a nice, friendly gangbang, but you have to be a stubborn little bitch about it. Too bad. Gang rape, it is. Bring her back in here."

Roman just tossed her over his shoulder and carried her in. She snarled and kicked until he wrapped one arm around her legs to keep her still. Seth closed the door behind them and locked it. Smiling, he grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled her head back. "You should lock your door. Someone might break in and rape you." He kissed her roughly, and Dean laughed softly as she moaned and tried to twist away.

He looked around. So many possibilities. He decided on the dining table. It took up about a third of the main room and must have weighed 500 pounds. They were more likely to break the bed than that table. "Over there. Strip the little slut and hold her down."

He watched while they did as he said. The stripping part was easy; she had nothing on under her dress. _She didn't know when I'd be coming back. She's stayed like that waiting for me, ready to fuck for me._ He was already hard; the thought made him feel like he could punch through concrete. She fought Seth and Roman like a wildcat, but eventually they got her down on her back, each holding one leg over their shoulders, spread wide. Roman was kneading her breasts with his free hand; Seth was running a finger along the wet slit they'd opened for him. "Hurry up, man. I want my turn."

Dean was wondering how close he'd come to getting his head blown off; he was also enjoying frustrating Seth. He went over and felt behind the couch. On the wall, sitting in a couple of shelf hooks mounted on the wall, was a shotgun, sawed way off. Yeah, pretty close. _Dumbass. You knew she was armed._

He walked over to the table unzipping his jeans. She'd stopped fighting them when they hadn't done anything more serious than some groping, but when Dean stood in front of her, making sure she was watching as he took out his cock, she started fighting again, twisting and trying to kick.

"Don't waste your energy on that, slut. You really think you can get away from them? Before they get their turns?"

"No, oh God, _no_!"

"Yes. You've got three cocks to service. Don't worry, you have plenty of time. We can rape every hole you've got numb in three days." He pushed the head of his cock into her. She screamed and writhed under him. He loved when she fought through the whole thing; fucking her while she was struggling felt amazing.

"Come on, _fuck_ this little slut. Make her scream."

It was the first sign Roman had given that he might be a little impatient. Citialli snarled at him, trying to kick him in the head. Roman laughed and pulled her leg back further. "What? You going to tell me you're not a slut? I saw you dance, babygirl. I heard you beg for cock. We brought you three. And you've got better places to put them than in your hand. Places for all three."

Dean demonstrated where the first one was. She screamed like he'd lit it on fire first, but she was so wet he almost slipped out, tight a fit as it was with her legs almost up to her ears. He heard Roman groan even over her shrieks and the smack of bodies crashing together as he slammed it to her as hard as he could; she didn't know it yet, but she _really_ wasn't done screaming tonight.

"Lying slut." Seth's tone was almost conversational, just chatting her up. "You love it." He laughed. "Look at her nipples. That body can't lie." He bent and sucked one of them into his mouth; Roman went for the other.

_They always were a good tag team._ Dean laughed and shifted his stance so he could go harder. She wailed and arched; it looked like struggling, but it got her nipples deeper into the mouths that were devouring them. He thought she was wearing down already. That would probably be all right; Seth at least would like a submissive victim to use. Roman wouldn't, but he was very sure she'd find a little more energy when she saw what _he_ had to rape her with.

Seth lost patience and moved up by her head. Roman moved a hand over to pick up where he'd left off.

"Suck me."

She made a defiant noise, teeth clenched. Maybe she wasn't through quite yet; she wanted all of them to force her. Seth slapped her across the face with his cock. It probably hurt; he was hard as steel.

"Open your mouth, slut."

She just glared.

"Make this little bitch open her fucking mouth, Dean."

That was easy, wasn't it? "Where is it?" Dean hissed. Roman let go of the nipple he was pinching and twisting and fished a bottle of lube out of his jacket pocket. He handed it to Dean and went right back to work. Both of her breasts were red and swollen-looking; he was really putting her through it.

She found more strength to thrash and twist when he squirted lube on her asshole. But she didn't scream or plead; she was going to make him force that mouth open. He put his cock against her, enjoying the way she clenched against him for a few seconds before he rammed himself all the way up in her. _Got it in one this time, baby._

She threw her head back and howled. The moment her mouth was open, Seth fed her his cock. Dean could see it drive down her throat and hear it choke the scream off into a helpless gagging sound.

"Ah, fuck yeah, _swallow_ my cock, damn."

She got the gagging under control after about half a dozen thrusts; Dean watched her start working her tongue over the underside. He slowed his thrusts a little to reward her. "That's it, darlin', you make love to that cock. Worship it."

"Yeah, you know you love those cocks in you. Never saw a slut who didn't like taking a good spit-roasting." In spite of what he'd said, Roman put his cock in her hand when he finally took it out. She couldn't see, but she could feel. She started struggling again, but she couldn't do much of it.

"Jack me off," Roman growled. "Just like you were so fucking hot to do to him." He started thrusting into her hand after a few seconds of whatever she was doing to him.

The best part of playing with her like this was not having to hold out; they weren't supposed to be getting _her_ off. Dean slammed it home and came, then pulled out and backed off to watch. He was wondering if there was going to be a fight for who got her cunt next.

There wasn't. Roman had his eyes closed, head thrown back, all the way into the handjob he was getting. Seth was paying more attention, since he was watching her throat bulge from the fuck he was giving it. He pulled out and went around. Dean smiled when he saw they weren't having to hold her legs up any more; she was doing it herself.

She didn't scream when Seth put it to her, either. Roman made an angry, heated sound when she squeezed him too hard, but she was focused on Seth, eyes burning up at him.

"_Damn_, she's tight. Roman's gonna fucking wreck this."

He'd forgotten about something. Dean went over and grabbed a handful of hair to get her attention. Yeah, she definitely looked like she was enjoying what Seth was putting to her. "Did you do what I said? You made it?"

She nodded.

"Good girl." He went and fished around under the bed where he'd told her to leave it. He'd wondered what a ceramic dildo would look like. It was white, and looked like a cock in a kind of artsy way. She'd put a blue flower on it for some reason. He found the pistol, too. That could be interesting. He pulled the clip and checked the chamber and the safety, then palmed it.

"That's it. You look at me while I'm raping you, slut. Look in my eyes when you take my load." Seth was up on the table, on top of Citialli, fucking her hard. He had her arms pinned down with his, and was holding her head still with two handfuls of her hair. She looked like she was seeing the gates of Heaven in his eyes.

Dean held the dildo up where she could see it. "This is safe?"

"Food-safe glazes. Oh _God_, fuck me." She was a little hard to understand, but he figured it out.

"Damn. Where the hell's _that_ going?" Seth was eyeing the thing a little warily.

"It's training equipment." He handed it to Roman. "You might as well do the honors, considering. Whatever hole you're looking to use."

Maybe it was the idea, or maybe it was her little ass bouncing as she took his fuck, but Seth finished suddenly. And hard. She collapsed under him as he pulled out.

Roman slapped her hand off his cock - it hadn't been doing much there while Seth was fucking her, anyway - and moved down to the end of the table. She sure didn't need any warming up after that. He put the head of the dildo against the lips of her pussy.

She wiggled and gasped. "It's _cold_."

"You'll get it good and warm."

She moaned and twisted as he pushed it into her. Dean had had to kind of guess at the size, but he thought he'd done all right. The cold probably felt pretty good, actually; she was red and swollen from the two cocks she'd already serviced.

He met resistance eight or nine inches in; there was more of it yet, another inch or two. "Relax. You're gonna take it all." Roman leaned over her and kissed her surprisingly tenderly, but he never let up on forcing the dildo in.

She moaned, clutching at the table. "It hurts, God, it hurts."

Dean laughed. "You must want the pain. You _made_ the damn thing."

Seth gave him an utterly confused look.

She let out a choked sob; it was all the way in. Roman was kissing her again, stroking her body soothingly. "You need to come?"

Neither Dean nor Seth had let her. "Yes, please, please..."

"My name's Roman, babygirl. Say it. You beg me for something, you say my name." He took the flared end of the dildo in his palm and started fucking her with it, long, slow strokes all the way in and out.

"Fuck me, Roman, please fuck me. _Your_ cock. I need it in me, please."

He pulled the dildo out. She'd made the head big enough that it stretched her coming out. "Damn, you're still tight. You take some wearing out, don't you?" He grabbed her legs and pulled her back to the edge of the table, resting her heels on his shoulders.

He was more gentle with her than the others had been; he didn't have much choice unless they planned on explaining to some ER doctor why he was putting stitches in a very well-fucked cunt. The dildo had opened her a little, but she hadn't made it thick enough. She made a noise that started with N and ended with a lot of vowels when he started giving it to her; she ended up with her ankles locked behind his neck.

She felt fucking amazing around him; he could feel every ripple, everywhere she was rough or silky inside. He took his time. He wanted to enjoy this.

"I know _all_ about you, babygirl. You play victim, scream and cry about getting raped, and you don't have to admit you love cock in you. You're gonna admit it to me. Say it."

She shook her head fiercely.

"Say it. You know what I can do to you for lying. Say it so I can make you come harder than you ever did instead."

"Yes." It was barely more than a whisper.

"_Say_ it."

"I love it, I do, oh God, _please_..."

"Go on. All the way."

She shook her head again.

It was enough; the rest ought to be Dean's job, anyway. "That's all right. But no orgasm for sluts who won't admit that's what they are." He went at her harder, leaning down so only she could hear him. "You should be proud of it, babygirl. You're fucking fantastic." He still didn't let her get off. He was busy doing that himself.

She curled up on the table when he was through with her. He headed for the couch. Dean was there smiling like the cat that got _all_ the cream. Seth was damn near asleep in a chair.

Dean woke from a half-doze 20 minutes later, ready to go again. He had a surprise he was looking forward to giving her.

She was asleep, curled in a ball on the table. Too bad for her. He shook her awake, and she just rolled onto her back and spread. He went from half hard to full-on in what felt like five seconds.

"Yeah, you're broke in good now." He got on her and in her in a couple of quick motions. She moaned in pain. Yeah, she had to be pretty sore. Her hands came up, then fell back to the table. He fucked her, going pretty easy with it - not as much as Roman did, maybe, but more than she was used to from him. When she let out the first moan that wasn't a hurt sound, he held the gun up in front of her eyes, then put the barrel to her temple.

"_Jesus_, Dean." He could see Roman getting up from the corner of his eye.

"The fuck you think I am, man? It's cleared."

Roman sat back again, but he was watching closely now.

He slid the barrel over her cheek and up against her lips. "Suck it. Just like it's Seth's cock. You liked sucking on that, didn't you? I didn't get to see too well. Show me how you sucked my friend's cock, you little slut."

She came, shuddering and jerking under him.

"God damn. It doesn't even have to _be_ a cock, does it? Just close to the right shape and you'll give it head." She really was going to town on it. He was liking it even better than he'd thought. "That's what you _really_ want, isn't it? Taking a hot load of cum at gunpoint." She was about to get it, too. It had to hurt like hell, but she was _working_ him. It was tighter than her ass. He wanted her to know who owned that sweet cunt. He used the hell out of it, then held her down for his cum while she sucked the barrel of the gun like she was hoping to get some out of it, too.

He rolled off her when he was done, but stayed on the table by her. When she looked like she was drifting off again, he brought her back with two fingers in her.

"Look at what a little slut you are. Only a slut goes to sleep with three men's loads dripping out of her raped cunt." He pulled his fingers out of her and held them to her lips. "Clean them. Eat our cum."

She did, moaning around her mouthful of fingers. He went back for more and fed that to her, too. He wondered how she'd like to live on just that for a day. He thought he'd keep that treat just for himself.


	5. Chapter 5

Dean had put Citialli in bed after she'd gone to sleep again - passed out, more like - and climbed in beside her. She was going to be sore enough in the morning without spending the whole night on a wooden table. It was her moans and the mattress bouncing like an earthquake that woke him up. Seth was getting in some morning cardio.

He watched lazily. Her fingers were tangled in Seth's hair, and she was arching to meet every stroke. His thing for making her look into his eyes while he fucked her was alive and well, too; it seemed to be driving her absolutely nuts. _Looks like there's a little something there. _He didn't think Seth would really know what to do for her, though. This, for instance - a straight-up, hard fuck ought to be a reward, not given out for free. She'd be disobeying him within a week just to get the punishment.

Seth rolled out with a grin and a bite on the neck for her. "Thanks, babe." The moment he was out the door, Dean rolled over, pinning her flat.

"You like that, don't you? He gets you wet just looking at you."

"He's a hottie. Knows how to use what he's got, too." She smiled. "But give me a week and I'd be telling _him_ when to fuck and how hard."

Dean laughed. "You know, I don't doubt that a bit. I'll bet you like to break your toys once in a while." He thought it might be fun to watch her do it, too. He shifted and slid his cock into her. "Good thing for you I'm not your toy, isn't it? Get me off."

She started wiggling under him. He shook his head. "No. Start working this sweet cunt. Jack me off with it."

It took her a few seconds, but she got the idea. He just lay there making her bear his weight and work the muscles inside her to service him.

She worked him hard; he could tell when she was starting to get tired by the soft sounds of effort she started making. "There's more than one way to wear you out, baby. Faster."

It took her almost fifteen minutes, and she was moaning from the ache when he came. He hadn't moved the entire time, and other than what she was doing to him inside her, neither had she. He pulled out and walked out of the bedroom.

It took a while before she could work up the strength to get out of bed. She ached inside, and her thighs felt weak as water. She was starting to wonder if he'd ever run out of new ways to use her. She hoped not. It would keep him coming back for more, and he was so far and away the best she'd ever had, the only race was for second. She considered briefly, then pulled on the dress she'd been wearing last night; one of them had tossed it in, and it lay crumpled on the floor. She smiled as she glanced in the mirror. She _looked_ gang-raped; Dean would like that.

They were huddled, talking animatedly. She knew what about, and she bit her lip against the moan that tried to break free. _They have to ask his permission._ She walked over to them; taking initiative was a risk with Dean, but she wanted it too much to not try. Dean took his time looking her up and down, the tip of his tongue running over his lower lip.

"Don't mind me, gentlemen. I have cleaning to do." She looked at Dean, head demurely down and eyes upturned. "Forgive me?"

"Get to work and we'll see."

She went to her knees and took his cock out of the boxers he'd put on at some point. She put a soft kiss on the head then started licking in slow strokes, root to tip, bathing him. She could taste herself on him. She could taste _all_ of them; that had come from inside her, too. She moaned softly and went on lapping at him.

And they went on talking: How they were going to fuck her, how often, what else they'd make her do for them. Dean approved all of it. Everything he agreed to made her hotter for them to get started.

"I want her ass. I'll make your little slut cry."

She clutched at Dean's thigh. There was no way she'd be able to take that from Roman, just no physical way. There wasn't enough lube in a refinery for that.

Dean curled his finger and thumb under her chin and lifted her head so he could look into her face. He kept her there for a few seconds, then smiled. "Lucky for you you're doing a good job. Get back to work." She did. "No, that's mine. It's how she's learning to mind me. I wouldn't be able to train the slut for a month after you got done."

She kissed his cock again. _Thank you, thank you._

He eventually nudged her away. "That feels good, baby, but right now I don't think it's going up if you strap a jetpack to it. Go make breakfast."

She discovered a problem in the kitchen: She didn't have even close to enough food in the house for four people. Not even to pull together a breakfast big enough. She turned to go tell Dean, and nearly ran into him. "I need to go take a shower."

"No. I like you this way."

"So would the clerk at the grocery store, I'll bet. I wasn't expecting _this_ much company."

"You're not going."

He saw the look that flashed across her eyes. _We're going to be having a talk about that._ "I'll send them. They have pants on. Write a list, and _good_ directions."

There was some grumbling, but the prospect of no food was a lot worse than a long drive to get some.

Dean waited until he couldn't hear the car any more. "Come here. Sit down."

She did, wondering what she'd done to get in trouble this time; he didn't sound happy.

"Did you really think I'd leave you alone with them?"

He liked that she really considered the question instead of just saying what she thought he wanted to hear. "I don't know. Am I theirs now, too?"

He tugged her down so most of her upper body was in his lap. He laughed softly when she went after his cock again, but pushed her hands away. "Just lay there. You are not theirs. You belong to me and no one else. We had...kind of a shit week at work. I thought they could use an outlet for some stress. And baby, you are _good_ for stress."

"Is there anything else I can do?"

"What did Roman say to you while he was fucking you?"

_Ah, all right. The line's there, then. No crossing._ She couldn't believe he'd noticed, let alone remembered. "That I shouldn't be ashamed of wanting to get fucked."

"He's right."

"He isn't, Dean. I'm _not_ ashamed. I don't do what I do out of shame. But it's not his. It's not for him to make me say it."

"Then say it to me."

"I love when you fuck me, Dean. I want it all the time; I feel like I'm crazy half the time. When you're not, I think about you doing it again. I love how you make me feel."

"Everything?"

"All of it."

"You weren't so hot for what I was doing to you on the porch last week."

"I...didn't think I'd ever see you again. I couldn't stand if you made me want _you_, just you, and then you left."

"Darlin', I'm not that easy to get rid of. So you're not gonna call me a son of a bitch for it any more, are you?"

"No. I'm sorry." She closed her eyes.

"How long are they gonna be gone?"

"Two hours, maybe three. It's 40 miles to the store. And the roads suck most of the way."

"Good." He pushed her to sit up, then stood and scooped her up off the couch. "This time you're gonna _give_ it to me." He laughed, an amused and startled sound she liked very much. "I do believe we're about to have sex for the first time."

It sounded flat-out insane given what he'd done to her already with his cock, but she realized quickly that he was right. They'd been fucking; this wasn't, not exactly.

He took his time peeling off her dress, his hands unexpectedly gentle on her body. He didn't stop her when she went to her knees for him, but he caught her hair and used it to slow her down when she went right for getting him off. "You just get me ready."

In spite of his protests earlier, it didn't take long to do that. She smiled to herself as she obeyed his order to get on the bed. _I turn him on. I please him._

He took his time, hands still gentle and easy on her, stroking her, doing things to her, getting her hot. That didn't take long, either. He parted her legs and held her hips pinned to the bed as she took her.

He wasn't exactly being gentle - she didn't think he was wired for that at all - but he wasn't being intentionally brutal, either. It was rough sex, but meant to please her as well as him. And it did.

"You're mine now." His voice was a growl that could make her wet all on its own.

"Yes, baby, it's yours, all yours. Take it. Any way you want, just _take_ it."

"No. Your body was already mine. It was mine the second you started begging me for my cock on the hood of my car. _You're_ mine now, aren't you?"

She nodded, eyes closed.

"Look at me. Say it."

She didn't want to. It was better now that he'd come back to her, but who was to say that he would again?

"Say it, Citialli."

She jolted under him; he almost never called her by name. But she still couldn't.

"Say it."

"Yours, baby, all yours, everything, I promise, I do..."

"Ah, yeah, good girl." His thrusts were more urgent now, still not rough, but hungry. "Come for me. Now."

"Oh God, Dean. Oh, _please_..." She arched hard enough that he thought he heard something creak in her back.

"Yeah, that's it, baby. You just let it go. Let it all out."

"Oooooh, _fuuuuuuck_."

He didn't think she was having the orgasm as much as it was picking her up in its teeth and shaking her. "That's right, give it up to me. Show me you love it. Show me you love it from _me_."

She came again. She might be afraid to say it, he thought, but her body figured out ways. She'd learn.

He carried her to the shower when he was done with her. Hell, he wanted one, too. She didn't seem to exactly be tracking what he was saying or doing, so he washed her, fishing stuff out from a little collection of bottles on the side of the tub. He lingered over her hair. He wasn't sure exactly _how_ there was cum in it; she'd taken it inside her from all of them, but there it was.

She didn't perk up from her daze; she was almost exhausted beyond functioning. She was going to have to sleep before they had her again, and eat, too. He had no idea how long ago her last meal was.

He was tempted to tell them she was off-limits now. _Mine. Just mine._ But it was a bad idea for a lot of reasons. Having a rebellion on his hands was one of them. Doing it when he _wanted_ to so much was another. She needed rest, and she'd have it. But after that...well, he didn't think any of them had done everything to her they wanted to, not yet.


	6. Chapter 6

Dean had been immovable about one thing: That they not say anything to Citialli about work. She still had no idea what he did when he wasn't with her, and he liked it that way. He wanted her kept entirely away from it.

"I'm sure she must think we're a bunch of accountants," Roman said with a grin. But he did understand. There was something uncomplicated about the way she simply took them as they were. _And in every way we want her to take us...that he'll allow, anyway._ She was finally awake - Dean had refused to let her sleep be disturbed, and she'd been almost unmoving all afternoon - and was cooking some of the enormous pile of food they'd brought back.

He didn't really mind being denied something; it was one thing out of dozens of possibilities. He was turning one over in his mind now: They couldn't say anything about being a team...but they could act like one.

He got it started after dinner. "Take care of the dishes later. I've got something you need to be taking care of now."

She came to him looking more than happy to skip doing dishes. "And how do you want it taken care of?" She started stroking and kneading him through his jeans. It didn't take long for that to work its magic.

"Get that dress off and get on the floor." She did, promptly. He went from hard to aching when she got down on all fours, arching her back to offer herself to him. Apparently she wasn't going to play struggling victim tonight.

She looked surprised when he stretched out on his back next to her. "Come here and ride my cock, babygirl. All the way down."

"Lazy bastard." Dean watched avidly as she moved to straddle Roman's hips, kneeling up as high as she could and letting his cock slide along the soft length of her inner thigh. Dean smiled; she'd woke up wanting cock, obviously.

"I said _ride_ it, not play games." Roman grabbed her with one hand and used the other to push the head of his cock into her. She wiggled around on it, obviously enjoying the anticipation of pain and pleasure.

"You don't want to ram this up in me, baby?"

"I told you what I want." Roman smiled at her suddenly; there was a dangerous edge to it. "No reason I can't have both, though." He grabbed her hips and jerked her straight down onto him. Her legs buckled under the force, and she fell all the way onto him. She screamed, but Dean could hear very well that it wasn't all pain. Not even close.

Dean had to admit he was impressed. He'd called her his fucktoy often enough, but Roman was _using_ her as one, sliding her up and down the length of his cock, controlling how fast, how hard, how deep. The both looked like they were enjoying the hell out of it.

"It hurts, ooooh, it _hurts_." It didn't really sound like a complaint. She quickly proved it wasn't, reaching to brush Roman's hair out of his eyes, smiling dizzily down at him as he kept on plowing her. "You like this better anyway, don't you baby?"

"Yeah...oh _fuck_ yeah. You're gonna, too." He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her down flat on him, sinking him even deeper. She moaned and moved urgently on him. Dean could see her wetness glistening on him. He was distracted enough by that - she was fucking dripping all over his cock - that it took him a few seconds to realize Roman was trying to get his attention. "Come get some of this, man. I can't promise I'm going much longer." He was smiling in a kind of half-crazed, half-delirious way.

Dean grinned at Seth. "She's playing for the team tonight." The _tight end_ joke was just begging to be made, but he decided he'd rather get started fucking it instead. He grabbed the lube and got down there with them, kneeling behind their grinding, churning bodies.

For a few seconds, he just watched, fascinated, as he lubed himself. Roman really was too big for her; he could see the reaming she was taking every time she bounced her little ass. "Hold her still."

Roman grabbed her ass, pulling her down as far onto him as he could get her. She groaned like an animal in pain as he worked his fingers in far enough to open her for Dean's cock. He didn't need any more invitation.

She whimpered and tried to pull away as he pushed his cock deep in her ass. It felt fucking incredible, so tight he didn't think he was going to be able to fuck her very hard. Roman held her still for it as her whimpers resolved into words. "Ow! Oh God, OW! It hurts, ow, ow, ow...Don't make me, oh please, ow, OW!"

Roman kissed her, fingers still dug into her ass, working it around Dean's cock. "You love it. I can _feel_ you do. You wanna take that pain for him don't you? You want to please your owner."

She shuddered in short, hard spasms that made Dean have to stop and take deep breaths just to keep from blowing his load in her right there and then.

Roman was laughing softly. "That's right, babygirl. I _know_. You fight it so hard, but you're losing, aren't you? No more rape for you; you get down and offer it now. Not even a slut any more, not when you do that. You're property now, _his_ property; you belong to that man fucking your ass. You just started your life as a sex slave."

She moaned, but didn't deny it.

"Yeah, and he shares. Why the hell aren't _you_?" Seth was standing over them. He sounded mildly pissed off.

Roman laughed and let go of her ass, sliding his hands up to curve them around her ribcage. He simply lifted her upper body as if he was on a weight bench, putting her mouth on level with Seth's cock. He liked the view it gave him of the cocksucking she was about to do; it was almost as good as the zero-effort fuck he was giving her every time Dean shoved his cock in her ass. He thought Seth would go right at her the way he did before, but he stood back so her lips were just unable to touch the head of his cock even though she was straining toward him.

"You say it. Say whose you are. Say _what_ you are. Then I'll fix you up right so you can't talk."

"Please, Seth. I need it, please..."

"Then say it." He glanced up at Dean. _Damn, he's railing her good, too._ He backed up a little more; the harder Dean fucked her, the closer he was pushing her mouth toward his cock. "Anything special you want her to call you?"

_Master_ was too obvious. Why have her call him the standard thing? "My name's fine, as long as she's obeying me while she does it."

She came again, that same brutal, racking spasming. Dean and Roman both groaned.

Seth grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled her head back. "You want it or not?"

"Yes, oh God, yes."

"Then say it."

She shivered. "I'm yours, Dean."

"I know that. _What_ are you? You want to be more to me than a slut with a tight little ass to pound, you tell me."

She hesitated one last time. Roman ended that by pushing her back hard into Dean's next thrust. She shrieked and started talking; hell, she was damn near singing it: His slave, his fucktoy, his property, his pet. He liked that last one. A lot. All the better she'd come up with it uncoached.

"My pet needs to be fed, Seth. Got something for her?"

"Oh, _fuck_ yeah." He caught and held her gaze as she obediently opened for it.

She started coming the moment she had enough of him in her mouth to suck; Dean would have sworn she never really stopped coming after that, just did it easier, then harder, then easier again.

Roman finished first, which was only fair, since he'd gotten an earlier start. "Drive her down on it, man, come on, come on, do it."

Dean laughed and did what he wanted. Citialli was babbling in moon language around her mouthful of Seth, Roman was blasting her full of cum, and Dean thought this was where he was going after he died if he ever started behaving himself.

Roman stayed under her when he was finished, their position and his size enough to keep him in her even while he was going soft. He just kept holding her up for Seth; he hadn't wavered, even while he was getting off.

Seth went next, groaning softly and pulling out far enough to give it to her in her mouth instead of down her throat. Eyes still locked with his, she ran the tip of her tongue through it, tasting him thoroughly, before she swallowed.

When Seth walked away and flopped on the couch, Roman lowered her back onto him, holding her tight to his body, hands working through her hair. He was caressing her, almost crooning to her, when Dean drove in deep and came in her. _He's stroking my pet._ He swore it was enough to make him find a little extra to give her.

Dean rarely did much more than half-doze. He was floating around the edges of that, thinking that teamwork was a really good thing. It was the first time he regretted that Citialli didn't know about them; he would have liked her to know just how good she really was for them. He looked down at her, curled almost entirely in his lap like a sleepy cat. He stroked her hair, feeling rather than hearing her small, contented sigh. _You service us in ways you don't even know, pet._


	7. Chapter 7

_Corporate suits have got nothing on us for team-building exercises._ Dean thought they had time for one more before they had to leave. They could stay longer if Citialli were closer to...anything; but out here she was so entirely his, secluded and waiting for him. It all kind of balanced off. Now it was time to give her a little more balancing off.

"Come in here, pet."

She walked in and stood on the living room rug, eyes down, waiting to be told what he wanted. For a while, all he did was look at her; that stance, that acceptance of her new role, excited him. The way Seth and Roman were looking at her too, he thought he wasn't the only one. He nodded to them, and they got up and surrounded her.

"On your knees."

She went willingly - even eagerly, Dean thought. She ought to be exhausted, but she came back for more, every time he demanded it of her.

"Hungry? We'll feed you, pet." He unzipped and took out his cock. "Start sucking."

She did, and there was no doubt it was eagerly. Dean just watched her go at it and enjoyed the sensations until he was close. "Look at me, pet." She did, eyes heated and half-lidded. "Don't swallow until I tell you."

She nodded, which only felt even more good to him. When he came, he pulled out of her mouth almost all the way, to make sure she caught it all on her tongue. She looked up at him, eyes pleading.

"No. Not yet. Go take care of Seth. Don't swallow, and don't spill a drop."

Her eyes went wide, but she turned, still on her knees, to face Seth. He was already hard and had been stroking his cock, watching her work on Dean. He took a step forward and pushed the head of his cock against her lips. "Go on, beautiful. Do me up right."

It wasn't easy getting Seth's cock in her mouth without spilling any of Dean's cum, but she managed it. Roman grabbed a fistful of her hair, wrapped it around his cock, and started pumping, groaning at the silky feel of it on him. Dean was wishing he'd thought of that. He wouldn't forget it.

It was even more difficult to suck Seth off without swallowing any of what she already had, but she wasn't going to fail her owner, even if by the time Seth finished and added to the mouthful she already had, she was having trouble breathing. She looked up at Dean, though she knew what the answer would be already. He shook his head. "All of us, pet."

Roman let go of her hair and smiled down at her. "One more night, babygirl. Tonight you still belong to all of us. You do what your owner tells you and make me feel good." He pushed his cock past her closed lips; he didn't think she could open them without making a mess.

He could see she was struggling to follow her orders, and to breathe. He was going to have to make this quick, not that it would be hard to do that. "Keep it there. Use your hand."

There was plenty left for her to do that, and she did her best with her tongue, as well. She had to fight to take what he gave her, but she did it. She was almost hyperventilating, desperate to get air through her nose.

Dean laughed softly. "Ever hear what oxygen deprivation does to an orgasm? Get up."

Roman had to help her. "Dean, man, she can't go much longer."

"She won't have to. Hold her up."

He had no idea what Dean was going to do, even after he went to his knees in front of her. Not until he grabbed her hips, pulled her against his mouth, and started eating her out. The sounds she made would have been shrieks, but she somehow was still managing to keep her mouth closed.

Roman caught Seth's eye; he wasn't exactly looking his direction. "Help her out."

Seth considered for a second, then cupped one of her breasts in his palm and sucked the nipple between his teeth.

It took less than two minutes by Roman's estimate, but she was in distress when she finally came. And she still didn't spill a drop, even when she started crying. _Tough little thing. And with Dean you'd better be._

"All right, baby. Drink it down."

She did, her legs buckling as she was finally able to take huge, whooping gasps of air. Roman eased her down so she wouldn't just crash to her knees. Rug or no rug, that would leave her in a bad way. She went limp against Dean, head on his shoulder, still dragging in huge gulps of air. Roman and Seth both stared in disbelief as Dean cradled her against him, stroking her hair lovingly. "Good girl. That's my good girl."

They left her alone with Dean the rest of the night. Things got loud a couple of times, but it was the kind of loud that said she was being very well rewarded.

* * *

The first two days after the three men left passed in a kind of timeless haze for Citialli. She worked, fired the kiln the second day without burning the whole place to the ground, and finally accepted that she had to go get some groceries.

The guy who ran the store was giving her openly curious looks the whole time she stocked back up. He didn't say anything until she got to the register.

"See you had some company."

_How the hell does he know where they were staying?_ "Yeah, I had guests for a few days."

"Famous guests. Better watch out around those boys. You could wake up with all of 'em standin' around your bed some night."

_Oooh, now there's a thought._ It occupied her for a few seconds before her brain processed the rest. "Famous?"

He looked at her like she might possibly be the dumbest cow on Earth. He reached over the magazine rack and pulled one off it, flipped some pages, and handed it to her.

Her first thought was _What the FUCK?_ Her second was _Standing around my bed. Dressed like that._ She put the magazine on top of her pile of groceries.

She spent a while looking at it when she got home. There were lots of pictures, which her brain still didn't want to reconcile with her "company." Just as a bonus, there were also last names. She finally decided it was time to use the internet for what God intended: Looking at men in an extreme state of undress.

She could have gone on all night, and probably well into the next day, but a couple of hours were enough to solidify what the magazine had sketched out for her: She'd spent three days being fucked senseless by three very dangerous men. And the most dangerous one was almost certainly coming back for more soon.


	8. Chapter 8

Citialli decided not to say anything to Dean about her unintended discovery when he called. He wasn't really looking for conversation, anyway, and she wanted to have this one face to face.

It disturbed her that she was letting a man who beat the shit out of other people for a living do as he pleased with her. And if she was honest with herself, it also excited her. A lot. No matter what the dynamic seemed to be, she knew she was the one in control; the fact that he was doing everything dead right said he understood that, too. She had an angry, explosively violent, and apparently not entirely stable man in hand. How could that not turn her on? If this new information made her wonder just how much in control she really was, well...risk was always part of this game, wasn't it?

She'd always played it at that level, too, or tried to. She found out early, and sometimes painfully, that a lot of dominant men - or ones who thought dominant and abusive were the same thing, anyway - didn't _get_ that. Way down underneath what they were doing, the roles were reversed: She was in control because she could stop it, and he gave up an enormous amount of control by accepting that as a ground rule. He had a way somehow of flipping it back, though, something no one had ever done the right way for her before, or even tried to. It was like they were both suspended perfectly between control and surrender, and it made the sex an absolute drug to her. She thought it wasn't much different for him.

No, what bothered her the most wasn't what he was, but why he hadn't told her. Shame? She couldn't see that. It was nothing to be ashamed of to start with, and if he did shame at all, she'd surely never seen it. Worry that she might want something from him - money, connections, whatever? That seemed a little more likely, especially in the beginning. But he ought to know her well enough now to realize none of that had any appeal to her. She had what she needed, and didn't want any more than that. She didn't want any more than him.

* * *

"Is this the welcome center? I'm fuckin' lost."

Citialli jumped about a foot. Dean was hours early and had come in quietly enough that he hadn't stirred her from her reading at all. She put the book aside and turned over; she'd been reading in bed, as usual. "I suppose it _could_ be the welcome center, poor stray tourist that you are. Seen anything you've liked?"

"Oh, yeah." He walked over and knelt on the bed between her ankles.

She twisted and tried to slip past him and off the bed. He grabbed her shoulders and shoved her back down, pinning her. "No. Take it. Just _take_ it."

_A little bit of literal submission?_ She was just fine with that. She relaxed under his hands, and he let her go, pausing long enough to push her dress up over her hips. He was on her and in her a few seconds later; all she could do was moan and part her legs more to let him really go at her.

He wasn't gentle; he was too aggressive to ever really be that. But for him this was the equivalent of tender lovemaking. He made her come twice, growling encouragement and obscenities in her ear in equal doses, before he lunged deep into her and finished. She just closed her eyes and let the aftershocks grab and shake her.

He watched avidly until it was over. Her eyes were slipping shut when he grabbed her by the throat, clamping down hard. Her eyes flew open again; he was glaring into her eyes, face inches from hers.

"Why didn't you tell me you knew? You don't keep things from me. _Never_."

Her body wanted to thrash and struggle, to fight for air. She didn't let it. She'd take her punishment until the moment instinct wouldn't allow it any longer. He denied her even that much control over the situation by letting go before it happened. "Answer me."

She had to take a few gulps of air before she could. "Not on a screen. Face to face."

"All right, here we are. Anything to say?"

She had her breathing a little more under control now. "It doesn't change anything, Dean. I wanted you before. I still do. _You_. Not some guy on TV. I didn't run out and buy one, did I? Why didn't _you_ tell me? Why did I have to hear it from a grocery clerk with a big, drooling leer on his face?"

"I liked how it was. Just us. Just because you wanted me. You didn't know when you stopped for me?"

"No. How could I?"

"Yeah, all right. I answered you. Now you tell me something."

"Okay."

"Why _did_ you stop? Why do you do that?"

"I didn't much. I've stopped for maybe two dozen guys who were stranded in the past seven years. I let three fuck me. You're the only one I ever let do what you did."

"_Seven_ years?"

"That's how long I've been here. Dean, if I were picking up guys at a bar, would you ask why?"

"I suppose not."

"The road's 12 miles away. The nearest bar is 85. And man, the pickings around here are really slim. I decided imports were my only hope. There's one thing I don't understand, though: How did you know I found out?"

"I stopped at the store on the way in. I shouldn't have sent Seth and Roman in. That _is_ a pretty professional-grade leer, though."

"And he's just about the best that's on offer around here. Still wonder why?"

"No. Not as long as you don't do it any more."

"What for? When you find your lost car keys, do you look in three or four more places in case they're there, too?"

He looked at her, wide-eyed, then started laughing. "All right. All right, then." He sat up and ran his hands through his hair. "I don't want this to change anything."

"It won't. Well, maybe _one_ thing."

"What's that?"

She whispered it to him, smiling all the while. By the time she was done, he was smiling, too.


	9. Chapter 9

"Are you sure you wanna do this?" Seth was damn sure _he_ wanted to, but he wasn't so sure about the method.

"I'm sure _she_ does." Dean smiled.

"She's gonna shoot one of us one day."

"Why do you think I let you go in first?"

Roman shook his head. "Could you two maybe sneak a little quieter?" He was so hard he could feel his cock throbbing with his pulse. Just the thought of her struggling was enough to do it. And he knew Seth was getting a little obsessive about fucking her again.

She was asleep in the middle of the bed with only a sheet over her. Dean nodded to Seth and Roman, and they carefully peeled it back to the foot of the bed. She was naked underneath. Dean leaned over her; he could see the cool air raise a wave of goosebumps over her legs, and she stirred restlessly at the sudden chill.

"What did I tell you? All alone out here, no man, so fucking hot. Just out here waiting for us give her the cock she's been going without. Wake up, slut!"

He snapped the last three words; Citialli was awake and fumbling for the gun Dean had warned Seth to push way under the bed when she really saw them.

She screamed and lunged up against the wall, pushing herself to her feet.

"He didn't tell her about the masks," Roman murmured to Seth. "Dean, you asshole."

He thought she had it figured out now, though. She was still standing in the corner, eyes flicking among them, but the panic was gone. It was something else entirely he was seeing there now.

_She's got a thing for rape fantasies - maybe you noticed_, Dean had said. _All of us, in gear. She begged me for it. Did things for me to earn it, things she never let me do before..._

"Come on down here, babygirl." Roman was purring, almost cooing to her. "Come on down and take what you got coming."

"Get out of my house."

"We will," Dean said softly. "When we're done with you."

"Nothing a pack of hounds likes to find more than a little bitch in heat, all alone and helpless. Get that hot ass down here."

Her eyes were flicking between them as she listened to the threats and promises. The more they talked, the more Roman stopped figuring in her attention. He waited until they were both telling her exactly where their cocks were going, how hard, and how often, and she was watching them, wide-eyed. Then he lunged across the bed, grabbed her ankles, and yanked hard, taking her legs out and pulling her under him when she fell.

"Did you forget I have plans for where mine's going, too?" He ground against her, letting her feel him hard and ready for her.

"No...oh please, no."

He thought it was more moan than plea. He could feel the heat of her even through his pants. Dean was right; she was hungry for this. And he was more than happy to get it started.

"No, man, you can't do that to her." Seth was smiling and shaking his head.

"Sure I can. I can do it way down in her."

"Sure. But who says you get to break her in? Put in."

Roman was glad the mask hid his grin at the look on her face as they did rock-paper-scissors to see who got her first. It took three rounds to sort out the order. Roman won. She thought it might not be an accident.

"Damn. But you _always_ pick scissors," Dean grumped.

"I saw you noticed. Thought that might come in handy some day."

"Asshole. Leave some for us, huh?"

Dean had made sure it would be exactly what she was craving, in all the details._ Don't take anything off. Just get it out, get it in her, and get off._ He had no problem with that.

The screaming and pleading started when he showed her what he had for her. _Just like you never saw this before. Damn, you are a treat._ He heard tape ripping as he pushed the head into her. He waited until Seth had her wrists taped together and bound to the headboard, then drove it in.

She shrieked like she was getting torn in half, twisting and bucking under him. He stayed where he was and let her ride it until she collapsed under him, whimpering and making choked pleas for him to stop, please stop.

"Ready for the rest?" He gave it to her all of it, hard. She shuddered, every muscle in her body locked, like she was being electrocuted instead of fucked. It felt amazing.

"Damn, the little slut's gonna come." Seth thought she probably already was.

"Told you. I'll bet that sweet little cunt ain't been used in years. All she needed was a little convincing and a lot of cock."

Roman kind of wanted to make this last. She felt damn fine around him, trying to hide how hard she was coming. But letting it linger would break the mood for her, and the mood she was in was too good to waste. He finished hard and fast, his groans loud enough to nearly drown out her renewed pleas, this time to not do it inside her - anywhere else, just not in her. He went as deep as he could.

Dean was on her the second Roman was out of his way. _Damn, she's not the only one this is doing it for._ He didn't have any problems with how to go at her, either; he went right to trying to drive her through the mattress, talking non-stop all the while.

"You think _I'm_ gonna let you just lay there and take it? You're gonna dance for me." He slid his hands under her and started jerking her into each thrust. "You get this sweet ass moving or I'm gonna keep doing it for you."

She was grinding against him before he even finished the threat, moaning that he was hurting her, begging him to stop. She was having a hard time hiding her pleasure now; "Please" was sounding a lot like a cry for more, not for mercy. He left her hanging, laughing at the furious sounds she made as he came and pulled out. "You be a good girl for our friend here, maybe he'll get you off."

Seth liked being the one to be gentle with her. It got her off hard, the change in sensation, in what was being demanded of her. She rose to him as he entered her; she was done fighting. "Such a dirty girl. The more cocks you get, the more you like it. Isn't that right?"

She moaned, shaking her head furiously. He grabbed her hair and made her look at him. All she could see around the mask was his eyes, but that was what he was interested in. "Tell me all about it, babe. All those secrets. I see them in those pretty eyes. You say them so we can all hear."

He was wondering if she'd say something, and what it might be. It was their locked gazes that gave him the message: _Too far. Don't do this._

"Shy? Fucked to a pulp like you just got and you're feeling modest? That's all right, sweetheart. You just scream it instead."

She did. It wasn't in words, but she screamed and whimpered and damn near sang when he let her come. It was good enough that he gave her another one before he finished in her and got up.

Dean leaned back into her field of vision as Roman cut her loose. "You thinking about telling someone what happened? Maybe calling the cops?" He held up the video camera he'd set up on the dresser before they got started. "What I got here says you're a little slut that can't get enough. You want everyone to see that?"

She shook her head, eyes wide.

"Then you keep that pretty little mouth shut. You do that, and maybe you can have cock in it when we come back and tell you to open it again. Now, you just sit here for ten minutes." He grabbed the alarm clock off the nightstand and put it in front of her. "You take that sweet ass off this bed before then, and we're all gonna take turns on it." They walked out laughing and loudly discussing what kind of fuck she was.

She made it to eight minutes before she had to know if they'd really make good on that threat.

They were gone.


	10. Chapter 10

Dean knew they had a problem about 20 minutes after they got to the hotel. "Someone fucking went through my bag."

Seth sighed. It had happened before, to all of them. "They get anything?"

"The camera."

It took Roman about four seconds. "Aw, _shit_. Tell me you took it out. You're gonna tell me that, aren't you?"

Dean just shook his head. Yeah, they had a problem.

They decided not to tell Citialli unless they had to; there was always the chance that whoever stole the camera would just dump the card and sell the thing.

It took two days. The internet didn't explode; it tac-nuked.

It could have been worse, for them at least. Dean hadn't placed the camera all that well, and it mostly got their fully-clothed backs. They probably could have denied it was even them, if not for two things: Their voices and Roman's tattoo. Citialli was the one who took the worst of it, every time one of them got off her. Her gynecologist probably didn't see _that_ much of her.

And they really were going to have to tell her now, because they did have one major problem: The DA in the state where the camera got lifted wanted to charge them with rape, and there was only one way to prevent that. She had to say it wasn't. Soon.

Dean put it off for about half the day, then he couldn't any more. He emailed her: _Call me. Clothes on. We have to talk._

He got an email before he got the call: _I know._

"I'm so _fucking_ sorry, baby. I should have put it in my carry-on, but all I could picture was the fucking TSA throwing a screening party to make sure I didn't have a bomb in it. How bad is it?"

"It could be worse. Half the town's seen it, but that's only like nine people. I think I'm going to be eating out of my freezer until it bottoms out. Going to the store isn't much fun right now. Are you guys in trouble?"

"Yeah, we are."

"The staties have been out here a couple of times wanting me to press charges. I can go make a statement. Will that do it?"

They'd no doubt take video of it. _Try some irony. It's good for the blood._ "Yeah. Christ, if you never forgive me for this, I don't blame you."

"It's not your fault. I'll go now."

It took another week for the non-internet uproar to die down. The DA backed off in the face of the video of Citialli - pale and shaking, but gorgeous in spite of it - calmly answering questions about sex games and roleplaying and safewords and how many times they'd done it before. She was scared, but she refused to be bowed, even when the questions got into territory they didn't need to go. They weren't going to get shame from her, because she didn't feel it. It left Seth with the very uncomfortable feeling of being completely turned on by watching it.

They came about as close to losing their jobs as they could and still actually be employed thanks mostly to an unexpected backlash of people, some with loud media voices, saying that their sex lives shouldn't be an issue of employment. They all got tweets from every two-bit porn producer that ever lived. Roman got a _lot_ of them, which was about the only funny thing in the whole mess. Seth thought he could probably find the block button in his sleep now.

Citialli had for all intents and purposes vanished after making her statement. She wouldn't answer emails or calls; a brief flurry of what few TV stations were willing to send news crews a couple hundred miles or more to her house all got the same shot of her locked front door. Dean had decided to go out there in spite of some very pointed suggestions from the front office that he shouldn't.

The day before he was supposed to go, she called. Seth was the only one in the room. The call wasn't for him, but the hell with that; he was worried about half out of his mind about her. He answered it.

She was crying. Hard. It took almost five minutes for him to get what was wrong out of her in words he could make out through the sobs: Someone had killed her cat.

"They tried to make it look like a coyote. But I pick up jackrabbits they got all the time. It wasn't a coyote. Seth, who would _do_ that? He was just a big, dumb cat. He never went outside. He probably walked right up to the son of a bitch hoping for something to eat. _Why_?"

"Sweetheart, I'm so sorry." _If they tried to make it look like coyotes, they tore it the fuck apart. I'd LOVE to know who it was._

"He was all I had. I buried him. What I could...could pick up." The shaky control she had crumbled again. She put her face in her hands and sobbed in huge, choked howls.

_You broke her heart, motherfucker. Nice job. And wouldn't I love ten minutes alone with you, too?_

It was that thought that smacked him in the back of the head. _Fuck. Oh, shit._

"Citialli? Sweetheart, listen to me." He waited until she looked up. "I want you to go get some clothes, a toothbrush, whatever you can get together in five minutes and put it in a bag. Go do it now. I'll wait."

"What?"

"Do it. Please. Right now."

It took her a little longer than five minutes, but she came back with a travel bag that looked like it had last seen better days ten years before she was born.

"Go to the airport. Get a flight to Kansas City. If there isn't one today, get the first flight going east, where doesn't fucking matter. Just get on the first one you can. When you know where it's landing, call me and I'll get you tickets the rest of the way. Do you need money?"

"I...no. Seth, I'm not going _anywhere_. If that bastard comes back, I'm going to be here to empty a shotgun in his fucking face."

That was _one_ of the things he was worried might happen. "You need to get out of there. Right now. _Please_ don't argue. Just go."

"I...all right, I guess."

"Call me as soon as you know where you're going. _First_ flight if you can't get one to KC, no joke, all right?"

"Yes. All right, if you really think I need to. Just don't flip out if you don't hear from me for a while. It's six hours to the airport, remember."

It gave him time to tell Dean and Roman what was going on. Roman looked like he wanted to eat a cat killer. Dean just turned, walked to the nearest wall, and put one hell of a divot in it.

They all worried anyway, even if they were well aware how long a drive it was from her house to the airport.

"It's a good thing they still have pay phones in airports, you know that? I got a flight to Kansas City. You...you're there?"

_She's so damn close to broken. Everything we did didn't do THAT._ "Why else would I be telling you to come here? It's not exactly somewhere you go to look at. When do you land?"

"In five hours. Dean isn't going to be happy to see me. Did you tell him?"

It bothered him that she hadn't already. "Yeah. It's fine, don't worry. And I'll be, so fuck it, right?"

"You'll be what?" Dean asked.

"Happy to see her. She doesn't think you're going to be."

"I didn't want her around this. Any of it. But it's got to be. Maybe for a while, too. She can't just go right back there alone."

"We can keep her away from most of it, man," Roman said. "We'll have all of us looking out for her. First thing is the office doesn't know she's here, or they'll want to put her on TV."

Seth laughed. "And then she'll shoot whoever's idea it is."

"We _could_ get rid of some people that way..." Dean didn't do innocent looks very well, but he did try.

It was the last city before their off time; at least that much was going right. Seth had started to wonder if maybe he hadn't overreacted, but if that was so, he was glad he did when he saw Citialli. She seemed composed, but she'd obviously been crying, and not that long ago. More than anything, she just looked tired.

She looked around for Dean - of _course_ she did - and he saw something crumble in her eyes when she realized he wasn't there. But she held her head up.

_Damn it, Dean._ All right, so he wasn't good at this stuff, and they all knew it; probably she did, too. But would it have been so hard to come to the fucking airport? Roman was going to come along, even, until he thought better of it and made sure Seth knew why: "Bad enough he's not going to be there. How much worse is it if he's the _only_ one who's not?"

_The hell with all of it, then._ He folded her up in his arms and pulled her close. Her whole body was humming like a wire. He still liked it, whatever the circumstances. It was the first time he'd been able to just have his hands on her.

"We should go. I've had enough of my picture taken lately."

He didn't want to let go of her. "_Let_ them see. It's not like it's news to them that I touch you."

She wiggled free. "No, Seth. Thank you for wanting to, but no."

He had the feeling he'd gone past some line she had drawn in her mind; it wasn't the first time. She needed the comfort so obviously, but she wasn't going to let him give it to her. _Sweetheart, if you think you're going to get it from Dean, you're in for a disappointment._

But maybe she didn't think that after all. Halfway back to the hotel, she suddenly slid across the front seat and snuggled into him. It was all good; he could drive one-handed. He liked how she felt in the half-circle of his arm, tiny and tough.

A few minutes later, he could feel her trying to shift down. God, it was tempting; but she didn't need that now, not really. She wanted comfort. If she thought that was the only kind she was going to get, he supposed it was understandable. _But it's wrong. With me, anyway._ But rejecting her wasn't going to do her any favors, either. He split the difference. "They have traffic cameras out here, sweetheart. Later." _And I'll do my best to take that slapped look out of your eyes, too._


	11. Chapter 11

Seth almost didn't bother with the text until they got to the room. He was glad he did.

_Don't bring her back here. Dean's going off. Fuck if he's not blaming her for all this._

And wasn't _that_ just great? He decided the best plan was to bullshit his way through. He got her a room, doing his best to make it look like that was the idea all along. "We thought you could use a little peace and quiet. And maybe 18, 20 hours of sleep. We won't be far away."

She nodded. He wondered just how fooled she really was.

"I'll be back later. Try to get a nap, maybe. I'll bring us some food."

"So you decided to drop the _we_ thing?"

"Ah, well..."

She shook her head. "It's okay. I didn't have a lot of illusions about how this was going to go."

"I'm sorry. Dean's...what he is."

She opened the curtains, looked out, and promptly shut them again. "Are you really coming back?"

"Of course I am. Don't worry, all right? It'll be fine."

It was one twitch, but he saw it, and he knew what it was. He crossed the room to her before he could think himself out of doing it. He wrapped his arms around her, crossed them so it didn't seem entirely like feeling her up, and pulled her back against him. "Hey, come on, now."

Her head dropped. He could feel tears hitting the back of his wrist. "Shhh. You're all right. I've got you." She seemed fragile to him suddenly, the first time he'd ever thought of her that way. _I could just wrap myself all the way around her._

She was the one to pull away - gently, but without any doubt. He let go of her slowly.

"Duty calls, right?"

"Yeah. I'm going to be back kind of late. If you get hungry, call down for something. But don't forget I'm bringing back all I can carry."

* * *

"I'm going to get her something to eat. Me, too."

"Yeah, right. See you in the morning." Roman smiled at Seth, but he looked troubled, too.

"Dean's still..."

"Yeah. Look, you be careful, all right? I've seen. But she's...not your type, man."

"How can you even be sure? It's not like we ever saw her do anything all because she wanted to."

"Yeah, true. And she _did_ like what you were giving her. But that's not all she likes, you know that."

"We'll deal with it. If it's even an issue. She's not feeling too sexy right now, you know?"

Roman nodded. He thought that might not be the case for long; he had a pretty good idea what the kind of comfort she understood best was going to be.

Seth went back to Citialli's room with a double armload of Chinese takeout. She looked at it doubtfully.

"I'm starving. And you're going to eat something if I have to sit here and feed you."

He ended up doing that, but not because he had to. She picked a little, but she did eat. He fed her because it was fun, and because it was silly and made her smile just a little. And because she kept licking his fingertips every time he gave her something. When she started feeding him stuff, he started licking back. It was pretty obvious where this was going.

When he ended up wearing about half of what was inside a cream cheese wonton, she bit back a giggle and licked that off, too. Off his lips and out of his beard. He slid his hand around to cradle the back of her head and kissed her. She kissed back with enthusiasm.

"Do you want to?"

She nodded and started tugging his shirt out of his pants.

He caught her wrists. "No. Do you _want_ to?"

"Please?"

It was still comfort she was needing; he knew that. He was fine with it, too. But she was going to find out there was more than one way to get it. "You don't move. Just sit here and wait for me."

He scooped up food containers and dumped the whole heap on the table. He considered, then peeled his shirt off; she might be a little less edgy if it was gone like she obviously wanted.

She went for the buttons on her dress. He shook his head, smiling. "I said wait. Lay back."

She did. The frustrated look in her eyes was really kind of cute. And pretty hot, too. He sat beside her. The first thing that had to go was the body-lock thing she had going on. Laying there mutely waiting to take it was not what he had in mind for her, not at all. He picked up her hands and put them on his chest. He thought she was probably really good with her hands; there was the whole pottery thing, and he still remembered Roman's _very_ pleased response to the handjob she gave him the first night. "Touch me, sweetheart."

He could have predicted where her hand immediately slid down to. Not that he minded exactly, but it wasn't what he wanted quite yet. He pushed her hands back up. "No. Not yet. Just _touch_. We're gonna get to know each other a little better."

It sounded insane considering what he'd already done to her, but she seemed to understand anyway. Her touch was sweet on him, tentative at first, more curious and explorative as she grew more sure he wasn't going to rebuff her. Or punish her. "Mmm...yeah, baby, just like that." He looked down. Her eyes were closed, a look of utter concentration on her face. _She does this with clay_, he thought. _Feels it, learns it, decides what she can make._ "Don't stop."

He reached around her arms and unbuttoned her dress, taking his time with it. A snip of a song he'd heard on the radio on one of the drives out to her place danced in his brain: _And I can't deny that Heaven lies beneath a cotton dress_.

It opened all the way down; he just let the two halves fall away from her. He half-expected to find her naked under it, but she'd dressed for travel.

She was watching his face carefully. "I didn't know. I'm sorry."

"For not getting arrested for indecent exposure if you bent over on the plane? We'll think of this as...mmm, wrapping the presents you brought along, how's that? It _is_ almost my birthday."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Birthday kiss." He tapped a finger against his lips. "Right here."

He pushed her down when she tried to sit up, and stretched out next to her instead, coaxing her with his hands to turn to face him, unhooking her bra and peeling it away. He took his time kissing her, pulling her close when she shied away, following her when she tried to pull back, until she gave in to it lasting as long as he wanted. When he finally pushed her onto her back again, her pulse was racing, breath quickened as if she'd run a mile.

"When's your birthday?"

"Three weeks. You're going to be busy."

He started at her mouth again, but moved on this time, kissing his way along the line of her throat, enjoying the shivers he felt wash over her. They turned to shudders and soft moans as he worked his way down to swirl his tongue around a nipple, then sucked it into his mouth. He went back and forth between them until she was raising herself to his mouth, fingers digging into his shoulders.

_Damn, I think she could get off just from this._ Another day. But he kept going a little longer; he wanted something from her before he stopped.

"Seth..."

"Shh. I'm taking the scenic route."

He worked his way down to her belly, all soft skin and jumping, twitching muscles. He bit as gently as he could, more scraping with his teeth than setting them in her flesh. When he reached the waistband of her panties, he caught them in his teeth and tugged. She arched hard and he caught her, holding her up so he could strip away the little scrap of cloth. One he got them past her hips, he used his hands to finish so she couldn't wiggle away from him.

He parted her legs; it didn't take much effort. "Hey, look where the scenic route got me." He grinned down at her, pulled the band out of his hair, and went down on her with flicking tongue, teasing fingers, and hair tickling her thighs and not allowing her to see where his touch would fall next.

He loved doing this, and all the more when it got a _really_ enthusiastic response. And she went postal - heels drumming, pounding the mattress, screaming his name postal. It made him wonder how long it had been since anyone last did this for her; it also made him want to do it to her a lot more.

He did, until all that was left to her was _pleasepleasepleaseplease_, like one long word. By then, he was almost out of his mind himself. He got up long enough to yank his jeans off, then fell on her, frenzied to get inside her, to get some sweet, wet friction happening for him, too.

She wasn't surprised when he tilted her head back to lock gazes with her; she already knew he _really_ liked that. But there was something different in his eyes this time, something demanding. She wasn't sure what he wanted from her that he wasn't already getting until he told her, his voice a low growl that made her ache down to her toes.

"Say my name. You say it when you come, show me you know who's making that happen."

It wasn't the most difficult order she'd ever gotten. She reached up, fingers finding their way in to tangle in his hair. She loved that; she didn't think he realized how much. _He wants me to touch him, he lets me, he MAKES me._

That was enough to push her off the cliff. She did just what he wanted, over and over, crooning, snarling, moaning, whispering. She was nearly singing when he finished, driving deep and pouring into her, filling her with heat.


	12. Chapter 12

Roman wasn't sure what he was going to see when he knocked on the door; nothing he hadn't seen before, surely.

What he got first was a tousled and very happy-looking Seth. It was hard not to smile, even if he had to be the bearer of yet some more bad news.

"Well, I know what _you_ had for breakfast. She awake?"

"Yeah." Seth finally absorbed the look on Roman's face; the smile hadn't displaced it for long. "What's wrong?"

"Better let me talk to her. I hate to fuck up your morning, man, but it's not good."

"What's going on, Roman?"

"Let me." _Let her associate you with feeling better, not worse._

Citialli was sitting in bed with Seth's shirt on. Given it was on backwards _and_ inside-out, Roman assumed she'd put it on in a hurry. He gave it a moment's thought, then went and sat beside her and wrapped her up in his arms. He held her tight enough that she couldn't mistake it for a demand for sex - or at least not do anything about it if she did.

"Babygirl, the police called this morning, looking for you. They've been looking all night." He gritted his teeth and got a little tighter hold on her. "Honey, your house burned down last night. They were looking for you in there."

He heard Seth's muttered "Fucking _bastards_" clear as a bell, but he didn't pay much attention. He was waiting for an explosion from the tiny bundle of woman in his arms. It didn't come. Carefully, he let go of her.

"I thought this might happen. Something like it, anyway. That's why I wanted to stay, Seth."

"Why? So you could die in the fire?"

The shrug that was her only response to that bothered him. A lot. He took over the hug duties where Roman left off. "It's gonna be all right. I told you before, and it's still so, all right?"

"Call the police back there soon, babygirl. Everything considered, I think they want to hear from _you_ you're alive." Roman nodded slightly toward the door. He had more to say that she didn't really need to hear. He and Seth went out in the hall.

"What's enough worse than that you don't want her to hear it?"

"They said it's a total loss. To the ground. I guess stuff really burns out there once it gets going."

"They say what caused it?"

"The cop I talked to said lightning is going on the report."

"_What_? What does it rain there, once every five years?"

"Yeah, I know, but think about it: They put arson on that report like we all know it was, her insurance company starts the eternal dicking about paying."

"Yeah. Yeah, all right. And where the _fuck_ is Dean?"

"Considering the look you gave me when I hugged her, maybe this is good news after all. Dean left. He went home."

"_Damn_ it." Seth was pacing furiously in a tight path back and forth between the opposite sides of the hall.

"Seth, he didn't know when he left. They called an hour after he went."

"You think he would have stayed if he knew?"

Roman sighed. "No. I guess he stopped blaming her after I yelled at him for it half the night. But he still figures their agreement, whatever it was, got broken. Whoever's fault, that means it's over."

"You know what? I'm not even angry. I'd have to expect better to get mad when it doesn't happen. I've got other things to think about."

"Like?"

"Like she has nowhere to go. She can't even go to a neighbor, however the fuck far away _they_ might be."

"Because one of them might have done it."

"Yeah. I'll figure out something. And you're getting to where you need to get home, too."

"Yeah, I am. But I didn't want to just _leave_, not now. She's going to be a little walking abandonment issue for a while, you realize that?"

"I'll just have to not abandon her, then. But I'll tell her if you want. You know, that it's not the same thing, you leaving."

"I wish you would. She doesn't need that mess." Roman had a pretty solid feeling his days of getting with her were over before they ever really got started. He regretted that; she was quite the treat, and she uncomplicated some things for him. But he had the impression Seth had some different ideas about how much those treats should get shared around than Dean had.

Seth went back in to find Citialli lost in thought. It wasn't a surprise. "You know what you're going to do?"

She nodded. "Collect the insurance, if there's any coming. Pay somebody to plow the whole thing under and put it up for sale. Maybe with that together, I can find somewhere else and start over."

"Not there."

"Fuck, no. There's other places. Quiet places. New Mexico, maybe. Not as isolated, but far enough away that I can work, and think without all the _noise_."

"It's hard for you here, isn't it?"

She nodded. "It's quiet to you, isn't it?"

"Yeah, for a hotel, not bad."

"It isn't to me. I hear the cars down there. Planes. People opening and closing doors, talking in the hallways. Someone's TV. You don't notice those things. But to me it's loud. I feel like I can't keep three thoughts in a row in my head."

He listened. No, it was quiet; the walls were thick for a change. He closed his eyes and _really_ listened. And just like that, he heard. And yeah, it was loud. "You get used to it, you know. People who live by the airport don't really hear the planes any more. You live by railroad tracks for a week or two and you don't hear the trains. Even quieter stuff. It takes a while to get used to the sounds a lake makes when you - "

She looked amused. "You look like someone just smacked you in the back of the head."

"I think someone did. Uh...do you like to fish?"

"_What?_"

"Never mind. I have an idea." He dug out his phone.

"Who are you calling?"

"Uh, well...my mom."

She would have sworn he was blushing.

"Mom? Hey, is anyone at the lake yet? ... Yeah, I was thinking maybe a couple of weeks at least. ... No, I'm still on the road. It's for someone else. ... Yeah."

She couldn't hear what the voice on the other end was actually saying, but it was definitely female, definitely pissed off, and now definitely having its say. Seth winked at her and mouthed _It's okay_.

"Yeah, well, that's a lot more our fault than hers. And someone burned her house down. That's kinda our fault, too."

There was more raging. A lot more of it.

"Hey, this is a big day. Mom says _fuckers_. Twice. You gonna wash your mouth out now? ... Yeah, in a couple of days. ... Well, I will, anyway. ... Yeah, me too."

He was absolutely blushing now.

"Did you really get your mouth washed out?"

"I still clench up when I smell Dial."

* * *

He decided to drive out; it wasn't all that far. The airport didn't kill her the first time, but he thought more this soon was pushing luck to its limits.

"It's not exactly silent out there, but it's pretty quiet. You can kind of get used to it. And have some time to think about what you're going to do."

"I know what I want to do."

"Yeah, but what I want you to do isn't in there, is it?"

She looked at him for a long time, those strange, pretty eyes of hers as unreadable as they could be - not that it was easy trying to look at them and the road at the same time. "What _do_ you want?"

"For you to not just vanish and then I can't find you. To have a fair chance with you." He smiled at her. "Did Dean ever mention that him driving alone was last-minute? I'll bet he didn't. We ended up with an extra rental some damn way, and I was going to do it. Maybe you'd have found me lost out there."

She spent an even longer time considering that. He finally said something just to break what was getting to be an uncomfortable silence. "What are you going to do about them? The people who burned your house?"

"Wish them well."

"_What?_"

She smiled at him. "That came from my brief fling with Buddhism. I took some good things away with me; that was one of them."

"I am _so_ fucking lost right now."

"If someone does something horrible to you, you do everything you can to get justice. And then you wish them well and walk away." She smiled at the look on his face. "If you keep on fighting a battle you can't win, or even if you just spend time hating them, they're going on hurting you - they own a piece of you. They're robbing you of time, energy, emotion, maybe even happiness you could have spent that time having. And you're _letting_ them. So you don't keep hanging around. And you don't hate."

"Wish them well and walk away."

She nodded.

"I...think that might be one of the wisest things I ever heard. And I'll be fucked if I could ever do it."

She fell back against the seat laughing. "It would make your job pretty hard to do, I think."

"It's made it easier for you about Dean, though, hasn't it?"

She nodded. "I have my baggage, he has his. I never thought it was going all the way to the end of line on the same cart. I can hardly believe it all _fit_ on the same cart." She ran her fingers down his arm. "Forgive him, Seth. It's not worth losing a friendship over - not when _I'm_ not holding a grudge about it, for sure."

"The mothership's going to come back for you eventually, isn't it?"

She softly whistled five notes at him. It took him a few seconds, but he laughed so hard he almost steered them off the road.


	13. Chapter 13

Citialli couldn't believe what she was seeing. It wasn't the middle of nowhere by any means, dotted with cabins as it was, but it was far from crowded, and the lake was huge and gorgeous.

Her concept of "cabin" took a hit, too. It wasn't big - a kind of living room and enclosed porch combination that ran along the entire lake side, kitchen, bath, two bedrooms doubled up to sleep four each if needed - but it was more of a trim wooden house than what she'd been envisioning.

"We'll get you a fishing license before I leave, just in case you want to get some worms wet. It's safe to eat what you catch. Swim, too. Better get you a suit, hmm? It's not _that_ private." Seth was mostly watching her eyes be enormous. He couldn't have been more thrilled with her reaction; this was going to work.

She finally caught up to what he was saying. "Worms? On a hook? Oh agh, not me."

"I don't think there's any plastic bait around. We always used nightcrawlers."

She looked utterly bemused. He just knew she was picturing a comic book character.

"I'll show you when it gets dark."

She could have imagined herself in many places, doing many things. Literally tiptoeing through soaking-wet grass behind Seth, who was armed with a flashlight the size of a loaf of bread...wasn't one of them.

"_There_. See?"

"Are you sure that's not a snake?"

"Positive. Get it!"

They both jumped for it. They both missed, and ended up in a tangle in the wet grass.

"Did a _worm_ just outsmart us?"

"Yeah. Aren't you glad you were here for the proudest moment of my life?"

"Absolutely, o mighty hunter." She laughed and slid her arms around him, making the tangle into a snuggle. "Have I said thank you a million times yet? I think I needed a place like this and didn't even know it."

"You start feeling better and that's enough thanks. I need to go see my mom and dad tomorrow, and you need clothes. There's no food out here, either. Like it or not, the city's waiting for you."

He wished right away he hadn't mentioned it, not just now. The happy light in her eyes went out like a breaker got cut. "Seth, I don't think I can."

"You realize it's not _that_ much of a city, right? About four times smaller than KC. Shit, it's practically cuddly. We'll go do the family thing, go get what we need, and be back here before you know it."

"Wait, _we_?"

"Were you planning on going downtown alone? Or maybe sitting in the car while I visit? Come on, sweetheart, they aren't going to bite."

"I would. How are they even going to look at me without thinking about it?" She looked at him hopefully. "Or maybe they haven't seen it?"

"No, they saw it. Or _some_ of it, I assume. If I thought they watched the whole thing, I'd be feeling a lot more awkward than you ever could. I mean, that's way TMI for your parents to have, you know?"

"And it's my fault. Seth, I _can't_."

"Can too. Besides, it's not your fault, and they know that." He grinned at her. "It's Dean's fault. This is _not_ the first time my parents have come to that conclusion about something, either."

She sighed. "I'm stuck, huh?"

"Yes, you are. Besides, I want them to meet you." He kissed her and pulled her fully on top of him. "Get used to you being around." He smiled against her lips as she started moving on him. "Kind of get the picture in their heads of you with me." He went for the most direct method: Unzip, push aside her dress and panties, slip it to her. "I think they've got a pretty clear picture of this part already."

"Ooooh...so will your neighbors."

He turned off the flashlight. Not that he thought it mattered; all of them probably _had_ seen the whole thing. But cloaked in darkness, she got a lot more enthusiastic, and in a hurry.

* * *

It went better than she'd been braced for, especially after she stopped trying to catch Seth's mom and dad staring. He kept sticking a gentle elbow in her side every time he caught her doing it. He also spent the afternoon sneaking kisses every time he got her alone long enough.

The fourth or fifth time she pushed him away with an urgent, muttered, "Seth, they'll _see_!", he marched her into the living room and kissed her there, in front of both of them, thoroughly.

"There. Now they saw. You can stop being so jumpy."

She thought his dad was trying not to laugh. His mom just gave him a long-suffering look and said nothing.

It was enough. There wasn't going to be a scene. She'd be okay for the two weeks he'd gotten her.

She shopped in a kind of organized hurry. She'd never worried much about clothes; a dress was fine, shorts and a tee for working in the studio. Seth insisted on a swimsuit, and further insisted on a two-piece. Very little of one. She didn't know how to tell him she didn't so much swim as fail to drown. Later. He was enjoying himself.

She threw in a bonus of her own when she saw a craft store on the way out of town: two huge sketch pads, a set of colored pencils, another of chalks, and a couple cans of fixative. Maybe she couldn't work, but all the greens and blues of the lake, after years of earth tones, made her hands itch to at least design.

"If you're sketching, there's something you need to see." He was thrilled to see her show an interest; he wished there were a place she could really work, but that was beyond his ability to produce by magic. He filed it on the growing list of what needed to be wherever she ended up. _Wherever WE end up._ He supposed he should talk to her about _that_ pretty soon, too. But this first.

"If we're lucky, no one still knows about it. Everyone on this road does, but we all kind of never told anybody about it." He drove past the cabin to the end of the road, which was cut off by tree branches, then slowed to a crawl and let the car roll through the branches into a clearing just big enough to park in. "It's a little walk from here." He took her hand and led her through the trees. She could just see a faint footpath worn where he was walking.

They broke through another tangle of branches. Citialli gasped.

They were standing on a gentle slope that ran from the woods down to the water. The sun was setting directly in front of them, as if it had been centered there just for them to see.

She had to physically restrain herself from running back to the car for the art supplies. Seth smiled at her. "Want me to go get your stuff?"

"You don't mind?"

"Of course not." He had plenty of time on the short walk back to form the question that had been gnawing at the edges of his mind for days now - maybe even from the first time Dean had brought him and Roman in to more or less use her like a whore paid up for the weekend: _What kind of men have you BEEN with?_

He sat beside her and watched; she didn't seem at all self-conscious about it, and in fact seemed to forget he was there at all. He didn't mind; watching lake, grass, and sky form on paper from a flurry of slashes, strokes, and smears fascinated him. "Hey, you're good."

She shrugged. "Enough to get the colors. That's what I want, something to mix glazes against."

He thought she was better than that, but he didn't interrupt again. It took her about 20 minutes to finish. She tucked the finished sketch back inside the pad. "Thanks for being so patient."

If she thought that was being patient...sometimes he completely didn't understand her. "I get a reward?" He tapped his cheek inside the line of his beard. She smiled and kissed him, then put a streak of orange chalk from her fingertip where she'd put the kiss. She looked like she was expecting to be giving further rewards; he put his arm around her and tucked her in against him and settled in to watch the rest of the sunset.

She was wary, almost jumpy as they walked back to the car. Something about the sight of it got the wheels turning. "What would you have done if it _had_ been you I stopped for?"

"Well, I wouldn't have fucked you on the hood of the car."

"No?"

He stifled a smile. She looked so disappointed. "No. I would have dragged you _in_ the car, where you wouldn't have room to struggle so damn much."

"What, where I could hit the horn, or kick it, and everyone would hear?"

"I can't imagine anyone would have heard out there. Here, yeah. Here I'd have to get you in the back seat and fuck you. A little more room to work, no chance of you hitting the horn."

"You think you could do that, do you?" There was no mistaking the light in her eyes.

_What the HELL is going on here?_ He knew she liked this stuff, there was no doubt about that. He didn't mind a little playing with it, either. But he had a weird feeling that she was trying to put something right, get it balanced into something she was comfortable with. _All right, let's see where you're taking this._ "Oh, yeah. I'm a lot stronger than you. You'd be down getting fucked before you knew what hit you."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." She put the sketch pad on the front seat through the open window, then spun on her heel and took off back toward the lake.

He was definitely stronger, but it was questionable if he was faster. He caught her just before she broke through to where people could have seen. He wondered what she would have done if she'd made it there as he hauled her back to the car. She kicked and thrashed as he dragged her backwards, her heels leaving tracks in the soft earth, but she didn't scream.

He opened the back door of the car and pushed her in. She fell face-down over the seat halfway in. He laughed softly and pushed the door against her, wedging her between it and the frame of the car. "Yeah, this looks like just what I need." He reached under her dress, leaning on the door to keep her pinned, and took off her panties. He thought about throwing them out into the woods, then imagined someone finding them; he put them in his pocket instead.

She was protesting now, still too softly for anyone but him to hear. "Oh no, not that. Please don't, _please_!"

He opened the door and pushed her up onto the seat on her knees before she could try to get away again. "Don't what, beautiful? Don't fuck you? Don't shove my hard cock up in you? You got it that way, you ought to take care of it. Is that what you don't want? My hot, thick cock fucking that tight pussy?"

"No...yes! I...stop, please stop."

"No." He pushed her legs apart as much as he could without her falling off the seat; she really couldn't struggle much back here. God, this was going to feel good. He grabbed her hips and held her still. She whimpered when the head of his cock parted her, but she was hot and wet as if he'd been getting her ready for hours.

_You get off on me doing what you say you don't want? We'll see._

He pushed into her gently, as slowly as he could bear to go. It took nearly a minute for him to get fully inside her. She was twisting and trying to drag herself forward and off his cock. "NO! Stop it, don't _do_ that!"

He thought she actually meant it this time. "I caught you. I get to do what I want to you."

"Please, Seth, _no_."

Calling him by name broke through the game, didn't it? He wasn't a stranger taking what he wanted now. He was someone she had to _deal_ with. And that was it, wasn't it? What this was all about?

"I'm going to do what I want. You can't stop me. And I want to do _this_."

He did the one thing she was afraid of the most: He made love to her, gently, tenderly, slowly. He made her come three times before he finished, just so they were clear on how things stood.

She was crying when he carried her back to the shore. It was dark enough now; they might as well be in a locked room. He put her down in the grass and laid next to her, pulling her tight against him.

"It's easier for you, being treated like...like a hole, isn't it?"

"Seth..."

"Shh. Dean treated you like that, like a fucktoy he could toss under the bed when he didn't want to use it. Hell, Roman and me, we did too. And you _liked_ it that way. You could do it right back, not have to deal with feeling anything."

Her fingers trailed over the back of his neck. "You didn't let me. Why?"

"Shit, if I want a blow-up doll, I'll blow one up. But you let me treat you different, didn't you? You let me make you look at me and see a _person_. And now you're stuck with it."

"I'm scared."

There it was, simple as that. "I know. I think maybe I am a little, too. Like on the Slingshot. Ever been on one?"

She buried her face in his shoulder. "Twice. I come."

_Yeah, that explains a LOT._ "Oh, man. And you can't spit without hitting a theme park around here. Guess what we're doing when I get back next week."


	14. Chapter 14

"Are you all right? _Are_ you?"

Seth didn't mind Citialli's hands all over him while she decided that for herself, but the distress in her eyes didn't do anything for him.

"I'm fine, I promise. Maybe you ought to stop watching, though. I hate to be what gets you all worried."

"I think not knowing might be worse." She snuggled in, apparently satisfied nothing was broken or missing. "I decided some things while you were gone."

"Oh?" _Here comes "I'm moving to the Gobi Desert, so long."._

"Yeah, two things. Where you want to live, we live. There's nowhere I want to go enough to take you from your home, Seth. Not even close."

"You're not happy here."

"No, but that will get better. Seven years is a long time, but I lived around people before that. I can do it again. I'm happier with you than I'm unhappy about the city."

_She wants to stay. She wants to be with me. The rest of it, we'll deal with._ He kissed her, doing a thorough job of it. "This isn't a bad place, sweetheart, I promise. You'll see."

"Mmm, you do enough of that, I'll start believing you."

He could think of some other things he'd like to do, too. But first..."What's the other thing you decided? You said there were two."

"I really want to punch your boss in the nuts."

He stared for a few seconds, then broke up laughing. "So do I. So I guess I'll have to do it twice. I'll feel terrible about that, too."

She sighed and burrowed back into him. "I wish there were something I could do to help."

"There is. Keep doing it."

She smiled at him and ran her hands up inside his shirt. It didn't take long for him to guess, thanks to her scratching him and biting at his lips when he kissed her, that she was trying to goad him into some rough play.

_Feeling a little too warm and fuzzy, baby?_ "Mmm, no. I want you sweet. Can you be sweet for me?"

She gave him a fretful look - the one he'd seen before when she wanted to get that distance in between again - but she nodded. "If you want me to."

"I do. I want you to be sweet." He kissed her as he was unbuttoning her dress. She didn't try to bite again. "I want you to not push me away so you can pretend it's just fucking." He pushed the dress off her shoulders; the top fell crumpled around her waist. "You can't be with me and run away from me at the same time. Stand up."

She did, clinging to the dress to keep it from falling any further. Seth laughed. "Let it go, baby. Let me see."

She did. Barefoot and braless as she usually was, she was naked now other than a brief nod at panties flowered like the most outrageous possible Hawaiian shirt.

One she was resigned to not playing games, resigned turned to enthusiastic pretty quickly. He'd figured out before long that she liked being treated gently - what she didn't like was admitting she did. His goal was for her to start _asking_ for it that way. He figured that was going to take a lot of getting used to for her, but he didn't mind that a bit.

He thought he frustrated her a little. Maybe more than a little. That moment just before they really got going when he was holding himself over her, looking down at her, barely touching - that was when she'd try her hardest one last time to goad him into roughness. He thought that probably worked pretty well with Dean; it didn't at all with him. Sinking into her was always met with a complicated fear-frustration-pleasure sound that traveled up his spine like a running brushfire.

This time it triggered a kind of awakening in him. _She ran Dean like a jockey on a racehorse, and she knew it. Push the right buttons, make him do it how she wanted. She can't push my buttons, so she's not in control._

He smiled down at her as she dug her fingers into his back. She _was_ letting go of that compulsion to control everything - this way and by giving in to staying here. _A little more and you'll be ready to admit you love me. And then we can really get on with this thing._

She already said it with everything but her voice, eyes locked with his, body rising to everything he did. It was just a matter of time. All of it was, really. And now that she'd resolved not to run from it, they had that time.


	15. Chapter 15

Citialli wasn't entirely surprised when Seth didn't come back after that night. She had no idea what she was going to say to him, and she thought it must be the same for him. What could either of them say?

She didn't have any better answers the next week, but she was waiting for him when he walked in.

Seth saw two things immediately: The tears streaming down Citialli's face, and the gun in her hands.

"I spent a good part of the last week thinking about which one of us I wanted to point this at," she said softly. "I decided on you."

"Do I get to explain?"

"You did that already. Do you have anything different to say to me than you did to Mr. Microphone?"

"No."

"A business partnership. And what does that make me? A frequent flier bonus? Or one of Dean's lunacies you figured you could enjoy, too?"

"It has nothing to do with you."

"Sure, other than you expect me to trust you. And if they can't, of all the people in the world, how can I? Tell me that, Seth. Explain how I still do that."

"I said it has nothing to do with you."

"And I heard you the first time. Did you hear me?"

"You'll do what you have to do. Just like I did."

He was right. At least she knew what that was now. She reached over, gun still firmly pointed at him, and grabbed the bag she'd packed and stashed beside the couch. As she moved toward the door, he moved away. There was nothing she could read in his eyes.

"I wish you well, Seth."

And then she walked away.

She found a hotel within walking distance - a lot of walking. The liquor store on the way was a bonus. She bought a bottle of Four Roses big enough to bludgeon an elephant with. If she was going to get smashed, she might as well do it with the best.

Four shots in, she thought if he came looking for her, there might be something to save. If he bothered. Nine shots in, she was thinking hard, if a little blearily, about what to do next.

She could go back home, such as it was, and get the place cleaned up. It wasn't likely to sell as it was. After it did, she'd have some money to do whatever she decided was worth doing. someplace quiet, someplace she could work again. New Mexico, maybe. She'd liked Ramah when she'd visited friends in the area a few years back. Maybe not being totally alone would be a good thing next time; she obviously needed someone to tell her what was or wasn't a bad idea. Or _who_ was or wasn't.

She'd long since lost count of the shots when she finally passed out.

What woke her in the morning was knocking at the door that was rapidly turning to hammering. She felt like most of it was echoing in her brain, but she got up and made her way over there. _He came. It took him a while to find me, that's all. He came for me._

When she opened the door, Dean was standing there looking grim. She tried to hide the slap in the face it felt like, but she did a bad job of it.

"So I'm not who you were expecting. Maybe you should stop expecting him. He's not going to come."

"I know. Why did you?"

"To see if you're okay."

"Well, you saw."

"Yeah. You're not. You smell like you rolled in a distillery."

"Thanks. I can't have a couple? I think I earned it."

"A couple of bottles? Why not?"

She spun on her heel and walked into the room, leaving him to catch the door or let it close between them. He caught it and followed behind her.

"Catching me while I'm knocked down again, Dean? You like me better that way, I know."

"Come on, that's not fair."

"You're right. When I _really_ got hit, you walked away."

"I'm sorry for that. I was as soon as I did it. But you know what you get with me. Were you really surprised?"

She'd turned away from him, and spoke so softly that he almost didn't hear. "Yes." She turned back to him. "Do you understand now, Dean? Why I did the things I did? Why I'm going back to it? If it had stayed that way with either of you, I wouldn't have expected any better than what I got. I wouldn't have felt like this."

"It didn't stay that? With me?"

"No. I broke the rules. I got what that usually gets."

"You never even gave me a chance to change them. Don't go back. Don't do that again. Fuck, if nothing else, it's dangerous."

"It sure is. And so is everything else. People fuck me up. I forgot about that. My mistake. I just want to get back to someplace empty and quiet with about zero rain and see if I have a life left in me to start over with."

"If that's what you want, it is. Let me help."

"I don't want help."

"That's sure a shock. But you need it. You're not going to be able to get back on your feet without a hand up. You can't let me do that? I owe you that goddamn much, at least."

"If you let me pay you back. With money."

"You don't have to do that."

"Yes, I do."

Something crackled in his eyes and was gone. "A business relationship. Yeah, that sounds like a great idea. Those work well, don't they?"

"They do as long as nobody makes any mistakes about what they are."

"Fine, if that's what you want. You come back with me and we'll - "

"No."

He felt like his brain was just going to go up in a cloud of whatthefuck. "No? Where are you gonna go? How are you gonna get there?"

"Home first. Later...somewhere. It's not the first time I've hitched."

"Yeah? And how do you think you're gonna be paying for the rides?"

"Exactly the way you think I am. It ought to get me something besides lied to."

"No. No way."

"You're going to stop me?"

"Yeah, I fucking am. Starting now. You get in that car with me or so help me, I'll drag you the fuck out there and throw you in. In a dump like this, they probably see that two or three times a day. I yell 'Bitch, gimme my money' a couple of times and nobody's even gonna look."

She was a long way from dumb, and he was kind of depending on that. She went out to the car with him silently; she even let him carry her bag without a fight. She didn't say a word for fifty miles, either.

"Why not take me where I want to go, Dean?"

"Wrong direction. Besides, were you gonna dig a hole and pull a tarp over it? You have nowhere to _live_."

"Adobe's damn near fireproof. I should still have walls. The roof probably collapsed if the beams caught, but no big deal. All I need to do is put up a tent inside and get to work."

"Doing what?"

"Cleaning up. No one's going to want to buy a pile of fire rubble."

"Hire someone. There's no way it's any safer for you there now than before."

"What the hell do I care? And I don't have the kind of money it takes to just throw it at all my problems."

"Didn't we fucking bitch and scream about this already? I _do_."

She sighed. There was something else she wanted to do, way more than the cleanup, but it didn't look like he was going to let her. "All right. We'd both better hope it sells fast. How long?"

It took him a few seconds to put together what she meant. "About six hours."

She nodded and went back to utter silence.

She stayed silent when he stopped for something to eat, too. He was braced for another battle over some kind of hunger strike, but she ate, even if it was pretty listlessly. He thought about following her when she went to the bathroom, but he decided he could still depend on her being smart. She was in the middle of nowhere, with no idea where she was, and he had the car keys. Everything she had to her name was locked in the trunk. Besides, he needed a few minutes. The second she was gone, he dug out his phone, hoping like hell Roman had his somewhere close by.

_Can you be at my place in a couple of days? I need your help._

_You dragged her off by the hair, didn't you?_

_More or less. Seth fucked her up bad, man. Really bad._

_You do know we had a hand in that, too, right?_

_Maybe. But you tell me who hurt her worst when you see her._

_All right. Enjoying your new hobby being a kidnapper?_

_Not much. But it beats the shit out of letting her do what she was going to do._

It mostly did, anyway. The second they were back in the car, she very pointedly went to sleep, or pretended to. He let her. They'd have plenty of time to fight over every little step of the way when he wasn't doing 85 down the interstate.


	16. Chapter 16

The ride was quiet - all right, silent - until they reached the river and the first good view of the city. Citialli froze like a rabbit spotting a snake.

"Dean, I can't stay here. I _can't_. You've got to let me go home, please. Just let me go."

It took him a few seconds to identify what he was hearing in her voice, because he wasn't even considering it: Sheer, complete terror.

"All right, it's not the greatest place in the world. But I live in a safe part. You'll be all right."

"No. No, I won't."

He knew cities freaked her out a little. But this was more than a little. He made a command decision and pulled over, ignoring the blaring of horns. She reacted to them like someone was beating her. "All right, tell me what's wrong."

She shook her head, eyes locked on her shoes. He didn't think it was _no_. It was _I can't_.

"Something bad happened to you in a city?"

She shook her head again.

"Claustrophobia? High buildings? Come on, it has to be _something_."

"I don't know, I swear I don't. I just...can't."

"Can you try for me? A night, and then we'll come up with something else. Keep your eyes closed, will that help?"

She nodded. She didn't so much close her eyes as clench the lids shut. The skin around them, and at the corners of her mouth, was bone-white.

"You gonna get sick?"

"No."

He pulled back out into traffic, to the tune of more horns and the most miserable sound he'd ever heard in his life from her.

He got her back to his place; he thought it would probably be a relief to her that his apartment wasn't very big. He pulled all the shades before he told her she could open her eyes. "Better?"

She nodded again. "Thank you. I'm sorry about this. I...thought I was getting better."

_Guess not._ There were plenty of hotels outside the city. If he had to set her up in one in the morning, that was fine. Something more permanent could come later.

She spent most of the rest of the day lost in thought. Dean didn't have much doubt that he figured in it; he found her looking at him most of the times he looked her way. If she was deciding what to do about him, all he could really do was let her.

He could tell when she did; it was easy. She got up and sat on the couch next to him. "Tell me what you want from me."

"Don't act like you hate me. You know, even if you do."

"I don't."

"Start there, then."

She thawed a little, but the sense that she was just waiting for the next kick in the gut didn't fade. She froze right back up the first time he gently broached the subject of sleeping arrangements. He knew there was no way she believed it, but his intentions were pure; he just wanted her to take the bed.

It took 15 minutes to convince her. He finally went and grabbed a chair from the kitchen and put it in the bedroom. "There. Put it under the doorknob. But I do know the difference between playing _I don't want to_ and real _I don't want to_. You don't want to. I didn't think you would, okay?"

She finally nodded, but she looked like she still had her doubts, and plenty of them. When she went to bed, she scooted straight to the edge of and curled up in a _Fuck off, I'm sleeping_ ball. At least she didn't use the chair; he supposed that was a start. Yeah, they were going to have to do something about this. He didn't think she was going to tell him what, either. He hoped like hell Roman could. He was really starting to think they'd made a huge mistake.

* * *

"Really, man? Come on. I slept out here." Dean pointed to the pile of pillows and sheets on the couch.

"All right. Sorry." Roman looked at the closed door of the bedroom. "Just how bad is she?"

"Like you'd expect: Like she's carrying her guts around in her hands."

"Did you tell her?"

"I wanted to. But it's not just my decision, is it?"

No, it wasn't. Roman went outside. He had a call to make - one that was better not overheard.

Twenty minutes later, Citialli was sitting on the couch, eyeing the two men standing in front of her with all the doubt in the world.

"We're going to take you home."

"Finally, someone's talking sense. I'll need some things. If you drop me at the airport, I can get my truck and - "

"No, babygirl. _Home_. To Seth."

She looked at Roman like he'd started singing opera at her. "_What?_"

They started explaining, one picking up when the other stalled out. It took a while.

It had been Seth's idea, of course: They could beat the shit out of Evolution in any numbers and combinations they pleased, but with their boss at the helm, they were never going to _win_ anything. They had to take the whole thing down to the ground. From the inside.

Dean had nodded agreement; he knew Seth was right. He'd also sighed like a man hard put-upon. "Not that I want to hang around with that pack of assholes, but yeah."

"You're not. I am."

They'd both just gawked at him like hicks looking at the big city for the first time.

"They'd never believe you'd do it," Seth had said, looking at Roman. He'd smiled at Dean. "You, they'd never trust. It's got to be me."

Laid out like that, it had been so obvious. Seth had been no more happy about having to be the one than Dean was, but it was what had to be if this was going to work.

One thing had troubled Seth more than all the obvious problems ahead. He'd gone to Roman with it.

"I want Citialli away from this. Far away. Fuck it up or pull it off, they're going to know I stabbed them in the back eventually. You think it's beneath them to take it out on her?"

"The only thing beneath those bastards is their feet."

Seth had nodded. "She's got to be somewhere safe. You two have to take care of that."

"Why can't you?"

"Because I'm not going to tell her."

"What the _hell_?"

"Man, if you can come up with another way, _any_ way at all, tell me, please. If I tell her what's going on, do you think she'll leave?"

"No. Shit."

"So you two have to take care of her. Especially _you_. Don't let her slip off and vanish, man, please. Not until I have a chance to put it right again when this is over."

He'd sworn to it. He'd expected to have to keep the promise a lot longer than this, but none of them had expected Citialli to be so utterly crushed. And as much as Seth had tried to ignore it away for her sake, Roman knew he had to be needing her now, in the worst way.

She said nothing all the while they were talking. She didn't for a while after, either. It wasn't so surprising, given that they'd just pushed the rest button on her world.

What they weren't expecting was her bursting into sobs. Roman sat down next to her and gave her a shoulder. "Hey now, babygirl. You're supposed to _not_ be doing that any more."

"How could he forgive me? He _shouldn't_. I said awful things..."

"And he was expecting every one of them. He knew what was coming. He was depending on it. You had to be pissed off enough to leave."

The asshole downstairs was banging on the ceiling with a broom again. Dean gave him some Riverdance, just to let him know he still fucking detested him.

"Oh, my God." There was a smile on Citialli's face - a little watery, but real. He wanted to cheer.

"We have hall sex, too."

"_What?_"

"We pass each other in the hall, he says 'Fuck you,' and I say 'Yeah, and fuck you, too'. A couple more times, and I'm gonna have to meet his parents."

That did it. She put her face in her hands and started giggling. It was good to see that again. Just the thought of going back to him was enough, Dean thought. If he'd had any thoughts of things going back to what they were - and he'd had a few, sure - that had to put a bullet in them. Seth was way out somewhere with her that he'd never had any intention of going. He really doubted they'd want any company there.


	17. Chapter 17

Citialli didn't have much to say on the trip back. She sat stretched out along the back seat, looking out the window and obviously deep in thought. It was an hour before she asked the question they'd been waiting to hear for the past 18 hours.

"Why didn't he tell me?"

Roman gave her the question Seth had given him. "Would you have left if you'd known?"

"Of course not! I...Oh." She lapsed back into silence again.

She got more nervous as the trip wore on. Roman kept flashing smiles at her in the rear-view mirror, but her responses got more brief and less convincing each time. She was a scared girl. He'd done all he could to convince her she didn't have to be; all he could do now was wait for her to find out for herself. If that took longer than about 30 seconds, he was going to give Seth a swift kick.

It took, by his count, 12.

He was starting to think they were going to have to carry her up to Seth's apartment; he actually saw her legs go watery as she got out of the car, and if Dean hadn't gotten her by the arm, she'd have landed on her ass in the parking lot. She turned a look to him that Roman could only describe as stricken. He smiled back, but she had to know by now that Dean was not where to go for comfort and reassurance. That was waiting upstairs, if she could get her feet moving.

For most of the 12 seconds, they just stood there, staring like they couldn't decide who was the deer and who was the headlights. Dean finally gave her a pretty firm nudge in the back, but she stood her ground; she hadn't put a foot inside the apartment yet.

Seth took care of that just as Roman was gearing up for that swift kick; he caught her arm and pulled her inside and into his arms in one motion. And then he was laughing, she was crying, they were both kissing anything they got close enough to, and Roman was dragging Dean up the hallway.

"What? I should at _least_ get to watch. That's gonna be one hell of a reunion."

Some things were reliable as the tides, Roman thought, and always would be.

Seth heard them leave - and Dean's grumpy protest, too - but it was the last thing he was thinking about now. He booted the door shut. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm so sorry."

She looked up at him, eyes disbelieving, shining with tears. "_You_ are?"

"Me. I should have told you. All I could see was them getting to you; they know about you now, that changes everything."

"It changes fuckall. I'm armed, remember?"

"Yeah. And there's more than one way of making it hard for them to find you. I could only see one, though, and that was it. Dean and Roman both tried, but I wasn't hearing." He took a slow, shaky breath. "It was hard doing that to them. Way worse than I thought it would be. And then I had to come home and do the same thing to you."

"Thanks for not using a chair." She beamed up at him. He stared for a few seconds, then started laughing. She liked that much better than the tired, wounded look in his eyes. "And I'm sorry for believing it, that you could ever do that. You going to let me make that up to you?"

"Yeah. But it might take a long time. A _really_ long time. Lots of apologizing."

"Would you prefer a verbal apology, or an oral one?"

"Isn't that the same thing?"

She shook her head; her smile was suddenly very different from the one she'd been wearing a few seconds ago. She wiggled until she'd worked enough space in his arms to slip down to her knees.

"Baby..."

"Shh. That's verbal." She unzipped his pants and took his cock out, giving it a couple of quick, flicking licks with the tip of her tongue. "_This_ is oral."

She stayed with manual for a while first, teasing, stroking him until he was hot and hard in her palm, then switching to pumping him, her grip firm. Her other hand on his thigh, she could feel muscles jumping and twitching. Sometimes it seemed like knowing she could do this to him turned her on as much as actually getting him off. Well, almost.

She dipped down and licked his balls, teasing first with the tip of her tongue, then caressing with the flat, rough surface as he shuddered and groaned. She gently drew one into her mouth and he clutched at her hair as she sucked on it, then let it slip out of her mouth. She smiled as he used his grip on her hair to tip her head back. "Weren't you trying to stop me just a minute ago? Fickle."

He answered her the most direct way possible - by feeding her the first four inches of his cock. Hips rocking, he gave her more with each thrust, until she was taking all of it, licking it on the way in, sucking it on the way out, answering his rhythm with hers. He was moaning, cursing, stroking her face with his free hand. She wanted it to go on forever, and she wanted to taste him right now, this second. She smiled around her mouthful of him; he was sensitive enough now that he felt even that, and shuddered, thrusting harder. She had a pretty good idea which of her desires was going to be fulfilled.

"Don't you ever leave me again, baby. Not _ever_."

She turned her eyes up to his. _Brown shouldn't blaze_, her mind murmured, but his eyes were crackling, lit from within like fire agates. The artist in her cried out to capture what she was seeing, to hold onto it until she could start sketching. Everything else in her cried out to have her thirst quenched. She slid her hands up his thighs, her little moans of need finally muffled by a blast of heat on her tongue. She drank - every drop, none spilled - then crumpled against his legs, trembling.

He picked her up and carried her to bed, relishing that he was carrying her to _their_ bed again, and that she knew it and wanted it that way. But when he tried to return to her pleasure for pleasure, she shook her head firmly. "You enjoyed it?"

"What, seriously? God, yes."

"Then just lay here and keep enjoying. Do _that_ for me."

He pulled her up against him. She was asleep in less than ten minutes.

He understood what Dean had wanted from her a little more now. Not the way he'd treated her, he'd never get that, but the whole situation - her tucked away safe somewhere, away from it all, _being_ his place away from it all. Something clean. He never would have thought of it that way before, but it all felt dirty now. Sometimes he came home and all he wanted was a shower, hot as he could stand. He didn't want her to ever feel like that; she still needed to be somewhere safer than sitting dead-center of his mailing address.

He was almost asleep himself when the idea whapped him upside the head: _Stupid. They handed you a metric fuckton of money, so put it to some good use. Make her happy with it. Right now, that's the best damn revenge._


	18. Chapter 18

It took Seth two weeks to get everything set up the way he wanted it. It might have gone faster, but he didn't want Citialli to know until it was a done deal. It was the first thing he'd been truly happy about since she came back; he didn't want anything to spoil it, for either of them.

The hardest part turned out to be packing up and loading the car without her seeing. She still didn't leave the apartment much, though he thought it was slowly turning into a preference more than a compulsion.

He got the whole thing moving by half-coaxing, half-scooting her out to the car, pleading wanting to go for a drive. It didn't take her long to figure out where they were headed, and she brightened more and more as they got closer to the lake.

Watching her buzz around the cabin like she was fussing over home after a long time away sealed it: This was a good idea. Her bouncing into his arms for a kiss was all bonus. "How long do we get to stay?"

"Until it falls down."

She just stared for a few seconds. "Which won't piss off your family?"

"Nope. I bought them another one about five miles up the shore. Bigger, more like a regular house, so my parents can retire there whenever, if they want. Everybody wins, nobody's pissed off."

"This..."

"Is ours. You good with that?"

He took more kisses to mean yes. "There's something for you in the bedroom."

She went, but not before she gave him an _And I wonder what THAT might be_ look that made him grin.

She was silent long enough that he started to wonder if he'd screwed up after all. He went in to see.

He found her in the doorway, staring at the little explosion of orange kitten sitting on the bed staring back at her.

He knew when he did it that he was taking a chance, but he couldn't resist. "He already bit me twice. Let's call him Shithead. It's all right, isn't it?"

He didn't get more kisses, but the hug was pretty good, too. He didn't even grump too much when she stopped to go pick the kitten up and give it a snuggle, too.

"Hi, Shithead. You're never going outside. I hope you're cool with that."

Something in his chest ached to hear that. When he went over to her, there were tears in her eyes. "Hey, this isn't what I was after, you know."

"I know. I'll be okay. What did I do to deserve you, anyway?"

"Whatever it was, don't do it again. God knows what you'll get next time. And it's not moving in with us, whatever it is."

* * *

It took a couple of weeks, but Citialli finally clued into what had changed: She'd found someone who needed her back just as much as she needed him.

The realization had almost sent her into a panic. Nobody needs anybody, nobody gets hurt. She'd been living that way for a long time, avoiding exactly what she was in the middle of now.

_I love him. I'm pretty sure he loves me. And I don't think either of us signed up for that._ But there it was. She waited for him to get home. Even when she was busy, lost in drawing, she waited. And so did he. He didn't so much arrive as crash through the door and lock it behind him against everything outside. It was obvious and intense enough to make her start trying to sort out why.

She almost wished she hadn't. She guessed he was supposed to look mean or cold on TV; to her, he mostly looked profoundly miserable and like he was in a constant state of trying to hide it. The internet was worse; there were enough death threats being thrown around to seriously scare her. She wanted to just grab everyone responsible and shake them and scream in their faces that they didn't understand. Which, of course, she couldn't. There really wasn't _anything_ she could do for him out there in the world. But she could do something here. So she waited, and did all she could.

The obvious thing she could do was no burden on her, of course. If he needed to know somebody loved him and wanted him, she knew just how to get that message across. But that meant doing something she really hadn't done before, not with him: Instigating. He wasn't particularly dominating, not unless he was doing it intentionally to please her, but he'd been perfectly happy to take the initiative once he realized that it was more difficult for her. Now she had to learn how. He needed nothing more than large and regular doses of _You make me so hot I can't stop myself_.

That wasn't exactly difficult to provide, given it was entirely true. She waited. She saw the misery in his eyes as he dodged yet another confrontation with Dean. She considered just what he might need to put the light back in his eyes in the place of that mourning. She waited at the door for him to get home.

He smiled when he saw her - he always had a smile for her, no matter how dire his trip had been - but it turned quizzical when she didn't say anything. "Am I in trouble?"

She twined her arms around his neck and kissed him, very slowly, very thoroughly. He tasted like grape soda. She thought he might have done it on purpose; he knew it was her biggest guilty pleasure. On the lips of her biggest guilt-free sin, it was only better. She kissed him until she got what she was waiting for - the double thump of travel bags hitting the floor at their feet - then stepped back before he could get an armful of her.

"Yeah?" He didn't have to work quite so hard to stir up a smile now.

She still said nothing, just reached out and unbuckled his belt, then stood, hands at her sides, waiting.

"Holy shit, is it good to be home."

She rode to the bedroom over his shoulder. Even upside-down, the rear view made her want to burst into a chorus of "My Favorite Things." She even managed to get her hands on some of the main attraction back there before he tossed her on the bed and followed her down before she could even start to rearrange herself. He did the kissing this time, hands tangled in her hair, biting at her lips to get her to open them to him.

She loved when she could get him like this. He'd play rough if she asked, but it was so much better when she didn't have to. She didn't mind making it easy for him, though, which was why she had nothing on under her dress. He figured that out quickly, given he had his hands under it within about a minute. His smile when he found his surprise was absolutely effort-free.

"Oh, you want to be like that?" Before she could answer, or just go right on and beg for it, he flipped her over on her stomach, hands rough on her. "Stay still. I've got something for you."

She blushed when he ran his hands between her thighs to part them. She was so wet he had to be able to feel it even there.

He did. "Oh, _damn_, baby."

She heard a zipper raked down and cloth yanked away, then felt his hands close over her hips. "You just take it like a good girl, now." He pulled her back into the first thrust, gave her all of it at once, churning into her, driving a pleasure-protest sound out of her. God, she was going to come before he even got started.

He knew what she wanted, and he gave it to her, his hips smacking against her ass, hard and fast right away, so deep in her. "You been wanting that in you, baby? You like what you're getting, don't you?"

"_Love_ it...ooooh, so good, harder, please, Seth, harder."

He found a little more for her. "So wet, so fuckin' tight. You know you're a good fuck, don't you, baby? Just down there showing off how good that hot pussy is. Think you're giving it to me? Do you?"

"Yes, baby, _yes_."

He gave her a stinging smack on the ass; it was the first time he'd ever done it. She came, wailing in lust and indignation. "You're not giving me _anything_. This is mine. You don't give me what belongs to me."

"Seth, yes...always."

"I know. I knew the first time, the way you looked at me when you took my cum. You wanted more, didn't you, baby?"

"Yes, God yes."

"Want it now?"

"Please, Seth, _please_."

He didn't make her beg more than that. He couldn't. He pulled out and rolled onto his back the second he was done. He gave her a minute for the feeling of being used to get him off to sink in, then called to her softly. She came to him, burrowed in as close as she could get, sighing like a cat being stroked as he pulled her in tight to him.


End file.
